ext_48718 (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
chesamus.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
ds_flashfiction2004-01-03 08:09 pm
chesamus.livejournal.com) wrote in ds_flashfiction2004-01-03 08:09 pm
Entry tags:
Amnesty Challenge - At The Movies
Long trip back from Ohio, but enough time to get this in. 1318 words. A follow-up to the Halloween Story Things That Go Bump” for the Movie Challenge.
I dropped Fraser off at the Vecchio’s after assuring Ben I was happy spending the night solo. Now that the Style Pig and Stella had returned to Chicago, Ma Vecchio had taken it upon herself to teach Fraser and Stella the fine art of keeping their men happy. However strange and bizarre my life was, no way I was sitting through a cooking lesson with my male lover, my ex-wife and her husband.
I started back to the Consulate. Ren had said something about garlic popcorn. I didn’t bother to ring the bell - when Bob and Ren get involved with a flick, the Martians could invade before they noticed. Fortunately the locks were still pathetic. I was past the office supplies and on the rug before they noticed me. Renfield snapped to attention and spilled popcorn all over the floor. Damn, he had made the garlic stuff. Bob just motioned me to a chair.
“Sorry, Ren, didn’t mean to scare ya. Can I help you clean that up?” Hey, I’m polite sometimes.
“Oh dear, that is to say, really, Ray, you must think, I mean-” He could go on like that all night. I guess I should have rung the bell.
“Don’t sweat it, Ren. Frankenstein does that to people. Why don’t you go make some more popcorn and I’ll get this cleaned up. “
“Go ahead, Constable. I’ll pause the film until you get back.” Dead Bob picked up the weirdest remote I’ve ever seen and pointed it at the set while Turnbull skittered out the door.
Bob actually tried to give me that Indignant!Mountie look. “I wasn’t expecting you tonight. May I ask where my son is spending his evening?”
“You can ask.” I always loved that line - Kirk was the master of cool. Pretty obvious though Bob hadn’t seen that one yet. Maybe I needed to further his education. “He’s at Ma Vecchio’s cooking school learning to be a good hausfrau, or at least the Italian equivalent. Since the other pupil is Stella, I figured I’d have more fun watching scary movies with you.”
“Which, considering that I’m dead, doesn’t say a great deal about your relationship with your ex-wife.”
“Or it says a lot about my relationship with you.” Snarky bastard.
I grabbed a broom from the corner and started working on the popcorn. Didn’t take long. Bob handled the dustpan and then tossed the sweepings out the front door for the birds, he said. I didn’t ask.
By that time Renfield was back with two large bowls. “I’ve done some adjusting of the recipe, Ray. I hope you like cheese.” Man, it was good. I wonder if he could be added to the lesson plan.
Bob started the movie again, and for the next little while the only sound was munching and the clacking of knitting needles. Bob was working on a new scarf, had been since we started Movie Night a couple months ago. I thought it looked like a ball of yarn had blown up on his lap, but Renfield assured me it was a pretty good attempt for a novice.
The monster was picking daisies when the pounding started on the front door. More popcorn on the floor, but this time I left it to Ren while I checked out the situation. Could have knocked me over with a feather when I saw it was Vecchio.
“What do you want?” To hell with Bob, the ghost I wanted out of my life was Vecchio.
“”Is that any way to greet your - your...” Yeah, I couldn’t think of a term either.
“What’s the problem, the chaos get to you?” I sort of sympathized, but I wasn’t going to let him know that.
“Every surface of the kitchen is covered with flour except Benny. It’s spooky how that works.”
And I suddenly knew just how to pay him back once and for all. “Speaking of spooky, we’re watching Frankenstein. Wanna join us?”
“Hey, that’s great. I love that movie.” He headed toward the lounge. I just grabbed him by the arm and dragged him toward the closet. “We’ve moved the TV.” Oh, I will surely pay for this, but it’s gonna be fun.
A blast of cold air met us at the door (more popcorn for the birds) then Renfield.
“Oh, dear.” He held on to the bowl this time.
Bob gave a wave from his chair. “Ray Vecchio, what a pleasure to meet you at last!”
“Um, yeah...” Vecchio couldn’t figure where to look - the cabin, the 52” plasma screen TV, or the dead mountie knitting by the fire.
“Uh, Stan, is that-”
“The father that Fraser came to Chicago on the trail of the killers of? Yeah.”
“Isn’t he dead?”
“Last time I checked. You want popcorn?” Ren hurried over with an extra chair. No, I don’t know where he got it. I said I don’t ask about some things, ya know?
“Have a seat, Ray. I’ll just get you a bowl.” Renfield in hostess mode was just the cutest thing. I really needed to hook him up with somebody. Maybe my barber...
“We’re ready to go here, Bob, let’s get this show on the road.”
“Right you are, Yank.”
Vecchio stayed quiet for about three seconds before he freaked. “Wait! Wait! What the hell is going on here?!”
“Oh for heaven’s sake. Are we ever going to get through this movie?” I liked Cranky Bob when it was aimed at someone else. The lights came back up. Vecchio looked like he needed a tranq.
“Yeah, Vecchio, just what is your problem?”
“What do you mean, ‘what’s my problem?’ “
“I mean what’s your problem? The popcorn burnt? Your chair uncomfortable? You having problems seeing the screen? What?” I am an evil, evil man.
Renfield was frantic. “Oh, I should have offered you my chair. It is perfectly situated and is so much more comfortable. Please, why don’t you--”
“He is getting older you know. Might be his hearing has slipped a bit. I’ll just...” I take back every bad thing I’ve ever said about Bob, who whipped out that alien remote and turned the sound up a couple notches.
What’s that word the English use? Gobbersmacked, maybe? Anyway, Vecchio looked gobbersmacked. “All of you are crazy, you know that? No way am I in a cabin watching a movie with a dead guy. How did you do this? Make this stop. Right. Now!” Vecchio pointed a finger at Bob.
”I hardly think so. After all, I do have permission to be here.” I guess I did tell him he could, didn’t I?
“Yeah, Vecchio, it ain’t up to you. Besides, I wanna see the end of the movie.”
“The movie? You cannot tell me this doesn’t creep you out!”
“Not at all. Course I was pissed as hell first time I saw him, but after that I got used to seeing him around.”
“What? He hangs around your house, too?”
Bob answered that one with a snort. “I am not welcome in their home, Mr. Vecchio.”
“Why not?”
I interrupted Bob before he could answer that one. “You’re a newlywed, Vecchio, I’m sure you can figure that one out on your own.”
“But - but?” Speechless - that’s a good look on the Style Pig.
“Vecchio, sit down, shut up, eat your popcorn, and watch the movie. Just accept the fact that Bob works in mysterious ways and he gets every movie, every football game, and baseball game ever broadcast.” I pushed him into his chair. “Let ‘er rip. Bob.”
“All right then. If there are no more interruptions we can finish this movie and still have time to watch ‘When Worlds Collide’ after.”
Renfield clapped. “Oh sir, I just love that movie!”
“That’s why I scheduled it, Constable.”
The room got dark again, the movie started. I could feel Vecchio settle in. Yep, he was one of us, now.
NOTE: For some great Sci Fi movie reviews...
http://www.rocketshipvideo.com/reviews/
I dropped Fraser off at the Vecchio’s after assuring Ben I was happy spending the night solo. Now that the Style Pig and Stella had returned to Chicago, Ma Vecchio had taken it upon herself to teach Fraser and Stella the fine art of keeping their men happy. However strange and bizarre my life was, no way I was sitting through a cooking lesson with my male lover, my ex-wife and her husband.
I started back to the Consulate. Ren had said something about garlic popcorn. I didn’t bother to ring the bell - when Bob and Ren get involved with a flick, the Martians could invade before they noticed. Fortunately the locks were still pathetic. I was past the office supplies and on the rug before they noticed me. Renfield snapped to attention and spilled popcorn all over the floor. Damn, he had made the garlic stuff. Bob just motioned me to a chair.
“Sorry, Ren, didn’t mean to scare ya. Can I help you clean that up?” Hey, I’m polite sometimes.
“Oh dear, that is to say, really, Ray, you must think, I mean-” He could go on like that all night. I guess I should have rung the bell.
“Don’t sweat it, Ren. Frankenstein does that to people. Why don’t you go make some more popcorn and I’ll get this cleaned up. “
“Go ahead, Constable. I’ll pause the film until you get back.” Dead Bob picked up the weirdest remote I’ve ever seen and pointed it at the set while Turnbull skittered out the door.
Bob actually tried to give me that Indignant!Mountie look. “I wasn’t expecting you tonight. May I ask where my son is spending his evening?”
“You can ask.” I always loved that line - Kirk was the master of cool. Pretty obvious though Bob hadn’t seen that one yet. Maybe I needed to further his education. “He’s at Ma Vecchio’s cooking school learning to be a good hausfrau, or at least the Italian equivalent. Since the other pupil is Stella, I figured I’d have more fun watching scary movies with you.”
“Which, considering that I’m dead, doesn’t say a great deal about your relationship with your ex-wife.”
“Or it says a lot about my relationship with you.” Snarky bastard.
I grabbed a broom from the corner and started working on the popcorn. Didn’t take long. Bob handled the dustpan and then tossed the sweepings out the front door for the birds, he said. I didn’t ask.
By that time Renfield was back with two large bowls. “I’ve done some adjusting of the recipe, Ray. I hope you like cheese.” Man, it was good. I wonder if he could be added to the lesson plan.
Bob started the movie again, and for the next little while the only sound was munching and the clacking of knitting needles. Bob was working on a new scarf, had been since we started Movie Night a couple months ago. I thought it looked like a ball of yarn had blown up on his lap, but Renfield assured me it was a pretty good attempt for a novice.
The monster was picking daisies when the pounding started on the front door. More popcorn on the floor, but this time I left it to Ren while I checked out the situation. Could have knocked me over with a feather when I saw it was Vecchio.
“What do you want?” To hell with Bob, the ghost I wanted out of my life was Vecchio.
“”Is that any way to greet your - your...” Yeah, I couldn’t think of a term either.
“What’s the problem, the chaos get to you?” I sort of sympathized, but I wasn’t going to let him know that.
“Every surface of the kitchen is covered with flour except Benny. It’s spooky how that works.”
And I suddenly knew just how to pay him back once and for all. “Speaking of spooky, we’re watching Frankenstein. Wanna join us?”
“Hey, that’s great. I love that movie.” He headed toward the lounge. I just grabbed him by the arm and dragged him toward the closet. “We’ve moved the TV.” Oh, I will surely pay for this, but it’s gonna be fun.
A blast of cold air met us at the door (more popcorn for the birds) then Renfield.
“Oh, dear.” He held on to the bowl this time.
Bob gave a wave from his chair. “Ray Vecchio, what a pleasure to meet you at last!”
“Um, yeah...” Vecchio couldn’t figure where to look - the cabin, the 52” plasma screen TV, or the dead mountie knitting by the fire.
“Uh, Stan, is that-”
“The father that Fraser came to Chicago on the trail of the killers of? Yeah.”
“Isn’t he dead?”
“Last time I checked. You want popcorn?” Ren hurried over with an extra chair. No, I don’t know where he got it. I said I don’t ask about some things, ya know?
“Have a seat, Ray. I’ll just get you a bowl.” Renfield in hostess mode was just the cutest thing. I really needed to hook him up with somebody. Maybe my barber...
“We’re ready to go here, Bob, let’s get this show on the road.”
“Right you are, Yank.”
Vecchio stayed quiet for about three seconds before he freaked. “Wait! Wait! What the hell is going on here?!”
“Oh for heaven’s sake. Are we ever going to get through this movie?” I liked Cranky Bob when it was aimed at someone else. The lights came back up. Vecchio looked like he needed a tranq.
“Yeah, Vecchio, just what is your problem?”
“What do you mean, ‘what’s my problem?’ “
“I mean what’s your problem? The popcorn burnt? Your chair uncomfortable? You having problems seeing the screen? What?” I am an evil, evil man.
Renfield was frantic. “Oh, I should have offered you my chair. It is perfectly situated and is so much more comfortable. Please, why don’t you--”
“He is getting older you know. Might be his hearing has slipped a bit. I’ll just...” I take back every bad thing I’ve ever said about Bob, who whipped out that alien remote and turned the sound up a couple notches.
What’s that word the English use? Gobbersmacked, maybe? Anyway, Vecchio looked gobbersmacked. “All of you are crazy, you know that? No way am I in a cabin watching a movie with a dead guy. How did you do this? Make this stop. Right. Now!” Vecchio pointed a finger at Bob.
”I hardly think so. After all, I do have permission to be here.” I guess I did tell him he could, didn’t I?
“Yeah, Vecchio, it ain’t up to you. Besides, I wanna see the end of the movie.”
“The movie? You cannot tell me this doesn’t creep you out!”
“Not at all. Course I was pissed as hell first time I saw him, but after that I got used to seeing him around.”
“What? He hangs around your house, too?”
Bob answered that one with a snort. “I am not welcome in their home, Mr. Vecchio.”
“Why not?”
I interrupted Bob before he could answer that one. “You’re a newlywed, Vecchio, I’m sure you can figure that one out on your own.”
“But - but?” Speechless - that’s a good look on the Style Pig.
“Vecchio, sit down, shut up, eat your popcorn, and watch the movie. Just accept the fact that Bob works in mysterious ways and he gets every movie, every football game, and baseball game ever broadcast.” I pushed him into his chair. “Let ‘er rip. Bob.”
“All right then. If there are no more interruptions we can finish this movie and still have time to watch ‘When Worlds Collide’ after.”
Renfield clapped. “Oh sir, I just love that movie!”
“That’s why I scheduled it, Constable.”
The room got dark again, the movie started. I could feel Vecchio settle in. Yep, he was one of us, now.
NOTE: For some great Sci Fi movie reviews...
http://www.rocketshipvideo.com/reviews/
no subject
no subject