(no subject)

[duesouthficrecs.livejournal.com]

"I'm going to die."

"Don't be silly, Ray. What would your father think if I let you die in the car?"

"That you'd better have not let me bleed all over the upholstery."

"Which you're doing right now."

"Damn!"

"Apply pressure."

"Why don't *you* apply some pressure?!"

"I can't drive and apply pressure at the same time, Ray."

"If I die, will you take care of my turtle?"

"Ye--Ray, you are NOT going to die!"

"Tell me that when I'm not bleeding like a stuck pig. Whatever the hell that is."

"A stuck pig is--let me tell you, Ray, you are NOT bleeding like a stuck pig."

"How the hell would you know?"

"I've bled like a stuck pig. Believe me, if you were bleeding like one, you couldn't keep it off the upholstery."

"Hey! Keep your eyes on the road! Stop looking at my bleeding! I want at least one chance in hell!"

"Ray--"

"And you complain about MY driving?! I told you, I'm going to die and if the bleeding don't do it, you will!"

"Ray, one thing before we reach the hospital..."

"What?"

"How in the name of Sam Hill did you manage to get a paper cut requiring stitches?!"

"Well, Fraser, you know my eyes..."