Seriously, I think you captured something there that speaks to why the thought of alien abduction is so scary -- it's the potential for galactic-scale DISAPPOINTMENT. For reals.

Well, think about it. If a species is advanced enough to get here from somewhere else and abduct people, then there's no doubt they'd be disappointed by humans. Because we don't come close to that level of scientific advancement yet. Right? ;-)

Thank you for the lovely feedback. It was quite the challenge to write this way, but I cracked myself up when I read the story aloud to my SO yesterday. He was cracking up too, so I considered it a success.