ds_flashfiction | Courteous Ray Challenge by leafy22 (Reply)

Title: And In Whose Arms You're Gonna Be
Author: leafy22
F/K - about 1700 words
Notes: Many thanks to sageness for such a helpful and constructive beta - and for her generous offer to beta this challenge. Pomus / Shuman wrote the lyric used in the title. Alliance owns everything else.

And In Whose Arms You’re Gonna Be

Fraser walked out of the ballroom of the hotel and into the wide corridor. The door swung shut behind him, deadening the melody but failing to block out the insistent beat of the music. It was cooler out here, as if windows were open nearby and Fraser took a deep, calming breath. The water splashing in the fountain outside was accompanied by the buzz of relaxed conversation. He sat down on something resembling an over-stuffed, over-sized footstool and loosened his tie.

Once the Canadian delegate for the Conservation Today conference had left, Fraser had hoped to spend the remainder of the evening with Ray. Ray had been willing to assist him as part of the security detail for the conference-opening gala night, although, curiously, it had been the fact he would have to dress to ‘blend in’ that had definitely secured his help. “So...you’ll be borrowing Huey’s tux again, huh?” he’d asked before giving an upwards nod. “Yeah, I’ll do it.” Sadly, Fraser had been unable to spend any time with Ray during the evening, making do instead with watching him from a distance. His disappointment was starting to make him irritable.

Having danced with the wife of Mr Beauchamp shortly before their departure, Ray had caught the eye of several ladies in the room. Each time he’d attempted to find his way over to Fraser, he was approached by another guest asking him to dance. He accepted each request graciously, occasionally casting Fraser an apologetic glance. At one point he’d got close enough to Fraser to poke at his arm and say “Don’t go,” before he disappeared again amongst the sea of dancers.

Fraser had danced briefly with one of the other party-goers, but she had seemed dissatisfied at the formality of his steps and he had been distracted by looking for Ray. Since then, he had stood by and watched the people around him become merrier while he grew more downhearted. If only he could be more instinctive about his movements on the dance floor. He knew the physical activity would be an ideal way to take his mind off things and improve his mood, but he would have preferred to run, or maybe even take part in a sparring session, than to dance.

Unlike Ray.

The first time one of the party guests asked Ray to dance he had smiled and even performed a small bow before spinning the woman into his arms and dipping her so low the crowd around them had let out a startled gasp. After that there was a steady stream of women asking Ray to dance. Leading each new partner gallantly to the floor he quickly assessed their abilities and guided them around in a way which not only showed his own flair but flattered their skills. From an up-tempo waltz to a salsa it didn’t matter what the music was, or how talented were the women he danced with. It was almost as if Ray was undertaking some sort of challenge to dance with every willing partner in the room. Even the band had noticed Ray’s talents and had started to play an increasingly wide variety of songs as if they, too, were keen to test his dancing proficiency.

Fraser tried leaning back against the wall but it was too far away. He looked around to see if anyone had noticed, but the group of people near the door had moved off, too busy with their own enjoyment to have seen him. He shifted uncomfortably, bemused by the impracticality of the hotel’s furniture. Why make a seat so big that you couldn’t sit comfortably on it without looking like a child whose feet didn’t yet touch the floor? He felt as awkward out here as he had in the ballroom.   Ray, on the other hand, had seemed completely at home amongst the dancers, adept at any move and flowing seamlessly from one style to another.

Fraser leaned forward until his forehead was resting in the palms of his hands. The pattern on the carpet was fraught with detail so he closed his eyes to block it out and thought instead of Ray. Dancing really seemed to bring out the best in Ray. His reputation as a fine dancer was truly deserved but his conduct during the evening had also been greatly impressive. Ray’s politeness to his partners was evident even from a distance and his manners appeared as effortlessly smooth as his steps.

In contrast, Fraser felt as though he had stumbled through the evening, the effort of struggling with his dashed hopes taking him out into this corridor, away from the crowd. He would have comforted himself with the idea that even in this, he and Ray were partners, balanced, their strengths and weaknesses complementing each other perfectly, but that seemed a fruitless thought after tonight. The charm Ray had shown to the women he’d twirled around the dance floor was surely proof that Fraser had yet again chosen someone unable or unwilling to return his affections.

The music swelled abruptly as the door to the ballroom opened. Fraser sat up and attempted a polite smile at the two women who came out. Their conversation was drowned out by the music as they walked past him, but before they turned out of sight at the end of the corridor, the door swung shut again and Fraser heard the words: “It’s so good to see a man who knows how to dance.” On the dance floor, Ray exuded an air of confidence, making him even more attractive than usual. Fraser could hardly blame other people for noticing Ray’s appeal.

The beat from behind the doors softened and changed to something slower, merging with the strings of a romantic melody. The thought of Ray dancing, pressing closer, moving rhythmically in such an intimate way to that music was unbearable. Fraser felt compelled to go, anxious to avoid such a heart-breaking sight.

He took a deep breath, telling himself sternly that an eighteen mile walk home would chase away his bad mood when the door burst open and Ray came rushing out – alone. He slowed as soon as he saw Fraser, the tension which had been briefly evident in his face softening to relief.

“Fraser, good, you’re still here! I couldn’t see you anywhere in there.” Relief turned to apology as he continued. “Sorry, you probably want to go. Probably wanted to go hours ago.”

Ray pulled at his bow tie until it was loose and unfastened his top button. Fraser could see a thin sheen of sweat on the newly-exposed skin at the base of his throat.

“But...it just felt so good to be dancing again. Nice to know I’ve remembered all the moves – I’ve kind of missed it, you know?”

Fraser felt a wave of guilt wash over him and made a non-committal noise. He did know how much Ray missed going dancing. Only the other day they had been in a music store where Ray had been looking for a CD missing from his collection. Unable to find it, he had nudged Fraser with his shoulder and said that ‘dancing with yourself just isn’t the same, anyway’.    He knew Ray had been excited at the possibility of dancing this evening. Why shouldn’t he take the opportunity to enjoy himself?

“’Course,” Ray went on. “I...um...I couldn’t dance with the one person I really wanted to dance with...”

Fraser cleared his throat, aware that he hadn’t as yet spoken properly to Ray since his arrival in the chilly corridor. “Ah. I’m sorry if the evening brought back painful memories." Fraser coughed again. "Of your marriage, that is.”

Ray’s frown lasted for less than a second before it was replaced by an exasperated smile.

“You really don’t have a clue, do you Frase?”

Tiredness, want and disappointment welled up in Fraser. No, he wanted to shout, I don’t have a clue. That’s why I’ve been out here...by myself. Instead, he tried to reclaim the courtesy and poise which had deserted him for most of the evening.

“I’m very sorry, Ray, if I appear somewhat....” He trailed off, wincing inwardly at the bitterness he could hear in his voice.

Ray stepped closer. His smile looked decidedly more nervous now, but his words were calm and gentle.

“Benton Fraser. Please may I have this dance?”

He held out his hand in invitation and looked steadily at Fraser.

Fraser stared at Ray’s outstretched hand. “Me?” he heard himself say, instantly regretting the foolish question.

“Yes, you.” Ray was grinning broadly, his eyes sparkling with affection. Fraser had not seen him bestow a look like this on any of his partners this evening. The one person I really wanted to dance with was....him.

Fraser's fingers trembled slightly as they slid over Ray’s palm. Ray’s hand closed around his and he gently pulled Fraser to his feet. Then Ray placed his other hand in the small of Fraser’s back. The relaxed beat of the music pulsed through the wall, soothing and mellow. Pulling Fraser into his arms, Ray exhaled slowly.

Their steps were slow, small and simple. Fraser let Ray guide him, concentrating instead on how well his hand fit with Ray’s, the way they were breathing together in time to the music and the faint trace of Ray’s sweat detectable beneath the lingering perfumes worn by the women he'd danced with. To be this close to Ray, to be his partner in this – and maybe more – was almost overwhelming.

“Mmm.” Ray sounded content. “You’re the one I wanted to dance with all night.” Fraser felt Ray’s sudden breath out against his cheek. “Okay, not just tonight. I’ve wanted to do this for ages.”

Fraser tightened his grip, pulling Ray even closer when a sudden cheer and swell of laughter from inside the ballroom made Fraser tense up.

Ray loosened his hold and stepped back slightly.

“You’re right,” he said. “Not here. Come home with me, yeah?" Ray looked at him with hope in his eyes. "Dance with me there?”

“Yes,” Fraser answered. He reached to brush the back of Ray’s hand lightly with his own. “I’d like that.”

“Come on,” Ray said. Side by side, they set off down the corridor, perfectly in step.