Honesty

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Not sure why I used this format, but it felt right. Managed to get it in

SCENE: break room, 27th precinct, Major Crimes Division, Chicago
PROPS: stale donuts, bad coffee and deaf, artic half-wolf sleeping under table
PLAYERS: Constable Benton Fraser R.C.M.P., Miss Francesca Vecchio

FRASER: (Stroking thumb across eyebrow) I beg your pardon, Francesca?
FRANNIE: (Agitated) You heard me. I'm tired of waiting. I want answers bucko! What is it? My butt? My Hair? Are my eyebrows too thin? It's my eyebrows isn't it? I was young, I didn't realize they wouldn't grow back. . . .
FRASER: (Pulling at collar) No, it's not your eyebrows, they're shapely and complement you cheekbones . . .
FRANNIE: Then it's my nose. Ya know I begged Ma for a nose job when I was thirteen, but she convinced me that my nose had character. . . .
FRASER: (Stammering) It's not your nose either, Francesca. I . . . You're a beautiful woman. . . . my . . . er . . .tastes just run differently. . . .
FRANNIE: (Indignant) Differently? Differently? Prettier you mean, smaller nose, better eyebrows, bigger hoohas, right?
ENTER: Detective First Grade Stanley Raymond Kowalski
FRASER: (More stammering) No . . . I . . . er . . .
KOWALSKI: (Sideling up, slipping an arm around Fraser and placing a kiss just below his left ear) What he means, Frannie, is that you had better stop hitting on my lover or I will personally have to kick you in the head.
FRANNIE: (Taken aback) Oh!
FRASER: (Blushing profusely) Ray!
KOWALSKI: (Speaking out of the side of his mouth) Just don't tell nobody 'kay, cause we ain't out or nothing.
FRANNIE: Okay sure, pansy's the word.
KOWALSKI: (Raising hand in threatening gesture) HEY, What do ya mean by that?
FRASER: (Growing exasperated, trying to gain Ray's attention) Ray, Ray, Ray, RAY!
KOWALSKI: (Scowling) What?
FRASER: Mum's.
KOWALSKI: Huh?
FRASER: Mum's the word. That's what you meant, isn't it Francesca?
FRANNIE: Yeah, whatever, pansies, mums, roses, whatever floats your boat. Jeez, Ray, you need to relax.

***

SCENE: living room couch, Ray's apartment
PROPS: grumpy, overfed, deaf, artic half-wolf laying on carpet, empty pizza box and drinking glasses on coffee table, television tuned to Hawks game- Chicago is losing
PLAYERS: Constable Benton Fraser R.C.M.P., Detective First Grade Stanley Raymond Kowalski

FRASER: (Trying to gain attention over TV) Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray!
KOWALSKI: (Not looking away from game) Um . . . yea, Frase?
FRASER: Earlier, when you paltered to Francesca . . .
KOWALSKI: (Looking at Fraser) When I what?
FRASER: Lied Ray.
KOWALSKI: (Letting gaze return to game) Oh yeah, what about it?
FRASER: I'm not sure it was wise.
KOWALSKI: Why's that?
FRASER: (Faltering) Well, in our line of work . . . that is to say . . . certain less tolerant members of the police force . . . er . . . not that I'd believe it of anyone associated with the 27th division . . . but, um . . .
KOWALSKI: (looking back at his partner) Relax Fraser, it's cool.
FRASER: (Blithering) It is? Are you certain? That is to say, are you sure as to what I am referring, as I have yet to reach my point? I seems to be drifting farther and farther from my tongue. . . .
KOWALSKI: (Putting a reassuring hand on Fraser's shoulder) I'm sure, buddy. It don't matter if she screams it from the rooftops, it ain't gonna change anything. Frannie was about the last person at the station who didn't think we were doing it.
FRASER: (Aghast) Good Lord, really?
KOWALSKI: (Quickly dropping hand again) Yeah well, two single guys, who spend all their time together and don't date much. People sorta' jump where they want. Hell, most of them think the quest for Franklin's Hand was a honeymoon or something.
FRASER: And this doesn't bother you?
KOWALSKI: (Too casual) Nah, I figure it's good for my stock. People think a drop dead gorgeous guy like you's into me, I must be something special.
FRASER: (Incredulous) Drop dead gorgeous?
KOWALSKI: (Smirking) Right, like you don't know it.
FRASER: (Almost to himself) I always assumed it was the Uniform.
KOWALSKI: Pfft, sure.
FRASER: (Grasping at straws) There's a certain ingrained deportment . . .
KOWALSKI: (Pointing two fingers at Fraser)People look at you and want only one thing, Frase, and it ain't your deportment.
FRASER: People?
KOWALSKI: Yeah?
FRASER; You said 'people' Ray, not women.
KOWALSKI: (Shyly)Yeah, guys too. Lots of guys. Guys who you would probably never imagine.
FRASER: (Sultry) Anyone in particular, Ray?
KOWALSKI: (Double take, followed by sly smile and moving onto Fraser's lap for a deep, soul sucking kiss) You know, Fraser, you're a good influence on me.
FRASER: (Kissing down Ray's neck to bite gently on his shoulder) I am?
Kowalski: (Arching his neck to ease access) Yeah, oh yeah! I mean, since I've been hanging out with you I quit smoking and drinking. Ooo, right there. I also swear a lot less. Fuck, do that again. And I almost never lie anymore unless it's in the line of duty.
Fraser: (Pulling Ray's shirt over his head) Almost never lie?
KOWALSKI: (Getting stuck in own shirt as he tries to unbutton Fraser's) I hadn't for a long time until this morning when I p-paltered to Frannie.
FRASER: (Freeing them from both shirts and hunting down a nipple) How unfortunate you broke your good habit.
KOWALSKI: (Writhing against Fraser) Yeah, I feel really bad about it too.
FRASER: (Finding the nipple and sliding other hand down the back of Ray's jeans to cup and squeeze) As well you should, Francesca is your friend, she deserves your honesty.
KOWALSKI: (Kissing Fraser again and then, speaking against his lips) Honesty huh? Well maybe we could fix it.
FRASER: (Pulling back to find and explore Ray's ear) Fix it?
KOWALSKI: (Standing up and pulling Fraser with him across the room) Maybe you could come into the bedroom and make an honest man outta me.

Comments

[patchworkdragon.livejournal.com]

That was worth the bad cut tag :)

I especially loved the last line.

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Sorry, I fixed the cut tag now. Thanks, The last line was the inspiration.

[the-star-fish.livejournal.com]

Actually, the format worked perfectly -- if you'd used either POV, it would've been imposible to hide the "twist". And I'm kicking myself, because it's what I should have used for one of the cliche-fics I didn't know how to write.

Oh, I almost forgot -- cute story!!

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I'll stop second guessing my self now.

[chesamus.livejournal.com]

i agree w/ starfish - teleplay was perfect for this. liked it lots!

[sihayab.livejournal.com]

LOL! This is wonderful!

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

I also swear a lot less. Fuck, do that again

You are so clever.

Your fan,
SHAY

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I'm rather proud of that little contradiction.

[akite.livejournal.com]

Nothing new to say here, but the format worked perfectly, and that last line was a killer. ::g::

[ozsaur.livejournal.com]

The format works fine and the story is funny. This is totally Frannie:

FRANNIE: Okay sure, pansy's the word.

Pansy

[themoo37.livejournal.com]

Pansy indeed. Brava!

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Thank you all for the kind words.

[brooklinegirl.livejournal.com]

I am realllly amused by this, mostly b/c I totally thought this was their way of coming out to Frannie. Love that it was Ray's idea of a solution to get her off Fraser's back.

Loved, loved this exchange:
Kowalski: (Arching his neck to ease access) Yeah, oh yeah! I mean, since I've been hanging out with you I quit smoking and drinking. Ooo, right there. I also swear a lot less. Fuck, do that again. And I almost never lie anymore unless it's in the line of duty.
Fraser: (Pulling Ray's shirt over his head) Almost never lie?
KOWALSKI: (Getting stuck in own shirt as he tries to unbutton Fraser's) I hadn't for a long time until this morning when I p-paltered to Frannie.

nicely done!

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[imkalena.livejournal.com]

ADORABLE! I also swear a lot less. Fuck, do that again.

::giggle::

::looking around carefully and whispering::

Pansy's the word!

[stinkybubbles.livejournal.com]

Thank you.