china_shop: Close-up of Zhao Yunlan grinning (Frannie)
The Gauche in the Machine ([personal profile] china_shop) wrote in [community profile] ds_flashfiction2009-10-28 10:04 am

Spooked challenge by china shop

Frannie gen, 500 words, G-rated. Character death.
Thanks and more thanks to [livejournal.com profile] mergatrude for beta.


Visitation Rights

Josie was crying.

Frannie hauled herself out of bed, struggling against gravity and tiredness borne of many interrupted nights, and stumbled into the nursery next door to check on her. By the dim glow from the streetlight, she could see Josie's blanket was scrunched down around her legs, and her toy penguin was missing. It was probably lurking in the shadows beneath the cot.

Frannie picked Josie up and kissed her cheek, rubbed her back soothingly. "Shhhhhhh! It's okay, baby girl. Mommy's here."

Josie hiccoughed.

"And where's poppa?" came a familiar voice from near the window. "That is, if she even has a poppa. Santa Maria, that I should live to see the day."

Frannie stiffened and turned slowly.

"You didn't live to see it, Ma, so give it a rest." Ma had passed away nearly seven months ago, but she still showed up every couple of weeks to give Frannie advice. She stood now, a shadowy spectre by the book shelves. Her lace shawl was crooked.

"To think that a daughter of mine would be so shameless, bringing a baby into the world without a father." Ma shook her head in disbelief.

"Listen, you want to dog someone, why don't you go down the hall and talk to your son, Ray?" Frannie hissed. It was infuriating, like the only reason Ma was still here was to scold her for being a loose woman. "You know your precious son's gay, right? You know he's sleeping in your bedroom with a man? God only knows the things they do."

Ma crossed herself, but said, "He's the head of the family, now. He doesn't listen to his mother. He can't even see me. But you, Francesca, you're my daughter. You're my baby."

"No," said Frannie firmly, "I have a baby. And I'm happy, okay? Tired but happy. If you want to yell at someone, pick someone else. Maria's moved to Wisconsin – go talk to her. I'm going to bed." She held Josie to her shoulder and marched out of the room.

In the doorway she paused and looked back. "Ma," she said, softly. "Take care, okay? Can't you find nocturnal rest, already?"

There was no reply. The room was empty. Josie gave a little baby yawn, and Frannie snuggled her and took her to bed. "I promise you one thing," she told her, stroking her soft downy face. "When I die, I'm going to leave you in peace. You'll be all on your own, little baby."

Josie snuffled. Her eyes were closed, and she was more or less asleep.

Frannie watched her until she couldn't keep her own eyes open a second longer. She let them fall shut, then murmured, "Not that I'm planning on dying any time soon, but if I do, don't worry. You won't be completely alone. I'm pretty sure your uncles will look out for you, just like they're looking out for me."

She lay back and let sleep claim her; it carried her off like driftwood on a rising tide.

END

[identity profile] qe2.livejournal.com 2009-10-27 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)


Lovely. And just right.

[identity profile] inathunderstorm.livejournal.com 2009-10-27 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww, I really like this! So perfectly Frannie <3

luzula: a Luzula pilosa, or hairy wood-rush (Default)

[personal profile] luzula 2009-10-27 09:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, Frannie. I liked this bit:

"You're my baby."

"No," said Frannie firmly, "I have a baby."
bradygirl_12: (angel (trees))

[personal profile] bradygirl_12 2009-10-27 10:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Nicely done! I've always had a soft spot for Frannie.
ext_1611: Isis statue (omg!)

[identity profile] isiscolo.livejournal.com 2009-10-27 10:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw, I like this. I like Frannie-fic. (Although I'd quibble with calling this gen since there's implied Ray/M, which to any reader would signal Ray/Fraser.)

It makes me think of North where Ray's dad shows up to yell at him.
ext_1611: Isis statue (f/k/v ot3)

[identity profile] isiscolo.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 03:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, hee, despite me being way more Ray/Ray than F/V my mind went to the latter. I wonder why? But of course you're right.
ext_12460: acquired from fanpop.com (Franniehand by Daughtershade)

[identity profile] akite.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 12:05 am (UTC)(link)
Awww...I'm glad Ray and whoever is down the hall are looking out for Frannie. Ma Vecchio needs to find her nocturnal (Hee!) rest and give it a rest. *g*

[identity profile] prudence-dearly.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 02:17 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, have you been in my brains? I was just thinking yesterday about how it's always dads haunting sons -- and how about a mother haunting a daughter. (I'm overlooking Maggie's ability to see Dead!Bob, for brevity.)

You've done this very nicely indeed. I particularly like that Frannie's still dobbing Ray in to their Ma, even after Ma's dead. That's a little sister for you.

[identity profile] green-grrl.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 02:43 am (UTC)(link)
With the canon ghosts, this is the next step! Poor Frannie.

[identity profile] brigantine.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 04:54 am (UTC)(link)
Nocturnal rest. Hee!

I like that bit where she softens and tells Ma to take care - that little gesture of love there, even though Frannie's quite clear that she's not going to take any nonsense. :)

[identity profile] buddleia.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 11:43 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, Frannie. Lovely, lovely.

[identity profile] akuni.livejournal.com 2009-10-28 05:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, that kind of hurt, I'm sad that the Vecchio kids had such parents. But Frannie is lovely, and she'll be a great mother, so that makes it all better. :)

[identity profile] exbex.livejournal.com 2009-10-29 12:51 am (UTC)(link)
Very nicely done :)

[identity profile] love-jackianto.livejournal.com 2009-10-29 07:23 pm (UTC)(link)
What a great story! I don't think I ever seen a ma ghost in this fandom (except for Bob's mom and Fraser's mom, but they're canon so they don't really count). It kind of makes me want to write something about RayK's mom haunting him.

[identity profile] love-jackianto.livejournal.com 2009-10-29 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
'(I've toyed with the idea of Kowalski's dad haunting him, and Fraser and Vecchio shrugging and saying, 'Hey, it's happens.' But I hadn't thought of killing off Barbara. *g*)'
That would be so cool. I can just see Ray Vecchio going, 'at least your pop's not jerk' to Ray Kowalski.

'Oh, that'd be interesting! You should!'
I might, it depends on if my muse sticks around long enough.

[identity profile] mizface.livejournal.com 2009-11-11 07:54 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know why I didn't comment on this when you first posted, but oh well.

This is just lovely. Having Ma Vecchio haunt Frannie is inspired, and the dialogue is terrific, as are the little details (like the crooked shawl) that make this so easy to see happening.

I think what i like best is the feeling of love and caring threaded throughout the entire piece.

[identity profile] verushka70.livejournal.com 2009-11-23 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
Ow. Ouch. This is so believable within the DS canon of Fraser, Sr. and Vecchio, Sr. Poor Frannie. You hit all the right notes for a spooky, angsty story, with a kind of happy end. \o/

[identity profile] dessert-first.livejournal.com 2009-11-28 12:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, Frannie. Lovely.