Bwwaaa! This is awefully Awful! It's bad in innovative ways I wouldn't have even thought of! The parenthetical sentence! The choppy diction! The stilted dialog! The whole aside sentences, useless, and in dashes! The logic leaps! Some favorite sentences:
Fraser got real apologetic and pulled Dief off and then he smiled this smile that lit up his eyes and Ray gave Dief a hot dog.
But Fraser didn't seem to be the type to go licking condiments off the ears of men. At least, Ray didn't think so until the killings started happening.
Ray was slim, but toned -- he stuck to the turkey dogs himself.
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Date: 2006-04-18 02:40 pm (UTC)Fraser got real apologetic and pulled Dief off and then he smiled this smile that lit up his eyes and Ray gave Dief a hot dog.
But Fraser didn't seem to be the type to go licking condiments off the ears of men. At least, Ray didn't think so until the killings started happening.
Ray was slim, but toned -- he stuck to the turkey dogs himself.
You are a mad genius, and I adore you for it!