Dead Bob Challenge
Apr. 8th, 2004 04:32 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
sam80853.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
ds_flashfictionI’m just giving it a try – it’s my first story here and it’s unbeta´d, unfortunately. So, there will probably be many mistakes – they are all mine!
Turtles
Ray didn´t know what woke him up in the middle of the night. Just a feeling that he wasn’t alone, that someone was watching him.
The hair on the back of his neck was on edge and he slowly opened up his eyes – first the right one than the left.
He was startled.
An older man stand right on his bedside, watching down on him but not really seeing him.
He was up in a second, out of his bed, looking for his gun.
“What the hell….”, Ray cursed, while he grabbed his gun, aiming at the man who didn´t move at all. Just watching him closely. “Who the fuck are you? How did you get in here?”, he asked furiously.
“Do the turtle has a name?”, the man spoke finally like it wasn’t out of the ordinary being here at all.
“Turtle? What turtle?”, Ray took a look around, not getting what this man was talking about.
“Your turtle, Yank!”
Turtle. Oh, right. My turtle.
He slowly lowered his gun, guessing his visitor was no harm to him when he wanted to talk about his turtle...
“No. No, it has no name”, Ray shook his head
The man went over to the turtle tank, watching it.
This turtle was in so many ways like his own son – strong walls that protect him from everything around. Too strong to get through easily. And it was his fault; he didn´t recognize in life but in death and he couldn’t much do about it.
“I want you to take care of him, to teach him what I didn´t.”
“The turtle?”, Ray asked in disbelieve.
“Did you got hit on your head, son?”, the man looked him over and Ray felt uncomfortable.
“I… you said turtle… and I…”, he babbled, helplessly pointing at the turtle tank.
“Just leave the turtle alone”, he man hissed, an annoying look on his face like he was talking to a child.
“But you started….”
“My son, Ray.”
“Ray? You called me Ray”, his confusion was written all over his face.
“It´s your name, isn´t it?”
“Who the hell are you?”, he started pacing up and down, hands rubbing over his face. “Wait, wait…” he held up his hands. “You said son, what son?”
“Benton, of course. Who did you think I’m talking about?” Another annoying look like he was stupid or something. “You’re not the smart one, son.” Head shaking.
“What?”, Ray hissed. “It’s in the middle of the damn night… you’re talking about turtles and… and…”, something just made click. “Fraser? Fraser is your son?”
“Bless god, finally”, Bob muttered under his breath.
Ray jumped almost out of his skin.
“You’re dead”, he said, looking at Bob from head to toe not believing his eyes.
“Indeed, son.”
“But…”, he started, stepping away from his uninvited visitor, “ …what do you want from me?”
“I already said that I want you to take care of my son, to teach him what I didn´t.”
“Take care… teach him… Can you please speak English not this Canadian stuff?”, Ray got impatient, he didn´t understand a word Bob was saying.
Taking care of Fraser – what a thought. Not that he didn´t want to, he did very so as much as he wanted to teach him some things he guessed Fraser didn´t even knew were possible.
He blushed right in front of Fraser’s father; damned
“That’s not what I meant, Yank”, Bob said, looking closely at him. “At least not entirely.”
Ray got even redder.
“Are you reading my mind or somethin´?”, he started pacing again, not able to stay calm, not with a ghost haunting him.
“You’re what he needs”, Bob confessed, seeing all this energy coming from his son’s partner. “And if he needs this other thing…”, he waved his right hand, “…than it may be this way.”
Ray was startled, were they still on the same page here, were they ever at all?
“You know, you and him”, again he waved his hands, not knowing how to spill it out. “Like when Buck Frobisher and I were on an ice field, chasing these two …”
“Don’t even start!”, Ray raised his hands in defence.
No way he was going to listen to another crazy Mountie story, not at 4:30 in the morning and surly not from a dead man.
“Just take good care of him”, Bob said again, stepping slowly away. “And Ray – give that turtle a name.”
“I will”, Ray promised in a low voice as Bob disappeared for his very own eyes.
He took a seat at his bed, rubbing his face again, shaking his head – Mounties! Than he laid down again and when he was almost asleep he whispered to his turtle: “´night, Bob!”
The End
mood: 
nervous
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no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 09:33 am (UTC)Also? Love the mood theme!
no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 11:01 pm (UTC)Love the 'middle of the night and all is surreal' conversation. - so he can bother Fraser by day and Ray at night:)
Hey, first flashfic
Date: 2004-04-08 09:45 am (UTC)If you are interested in getting a beta just for grammar and spelling, and nobody else volunteers, well, I'm available.
Re: Hey, first flashfic
Date: 2004-04-08 11:03 pm (UTC)...and I would like to have you as my beta - I really need one!:)
Re: Hey, first flashfic
Date: 2004-04-12 06:36 pm (UTC)When you ever have anything let me know and we'll go from there.
Later
no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 11:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 11:05 pm (UTC)Love your icon!:)
no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 02:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 11:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 06:39 pm (UTC)Of course he isn't. Ray's the pretty one. ::g:: Welcome! I liked the story.
no subject
Date: 2004-04-08 11:11 pm (UTC)Re: Hey, first flashfic
Date: 2004-04-09 04:17 am (UTC)Re: Hey, first flashfic
Date: 2004-04-09 04:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-04-09 07:33 am (UTC)ooo. This gave me chills. Perfect!
What a terrific idea and theme this is. Great job!
no subject
Date: 2004-04-09 07:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-04 04:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-04 07:43 pm (UTC)Thank you!