Scars: Every Which Ray

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Me and flashfiction, we don't go together so well. About as well as n-heptane and fuckin' Coca-cola, man. I'd try and polish this more, but I swear if I look at another paragraph about Fraser's cock, I'm gonna scream.

pearl_o: Sorry kiddo, what can I say? I tried *g*.

Title: Every Which Ray
Author: Ineke
Rating: Gratuitous Porn
Pairing: Vecchio/Fraser/Kowalski



"I feel like I'm about to fuck a virgin," Ray says, looking over Fraser's shoulder at Ray -- the other Ray, and dear lord, this could be confusing. Already is confusing. What was it his father had said? We all make our own beds, son, but sometimes we don't get to choose who we lie in them with... or something like that, one of the terrible metaphors that his father seemed to enjoy substituting for adequate parenting; and really, it doesn't matter at all now, does it? As always, his father is wrong, dead wrong, dead and wrong, and there's just no advice that can help a situation like this, where Ray Kowalski is kneeling naked in front of him and Ray Vecchio is kneeling naked behind him. Ray in front of him has an intense, petitioning expression, and his hands are resting on his thighs, index finger tapping softly. The mattress settles slightly behind Fraser with Ray Vecchio's weight, and Fraser feels like he's falling.

Falling backwards and falling forward. Doesn't know which way to go, so here he is going every which Ray at once--

Fraser stifles the urge to laugh hysterically; settles instead for a peculiar choking sound.

Behind him, Ray snaps, "He's not a fucking virgin, Kowalski."

"Yeah, 'cause if he was fucking then he wouldn't be a virgin, Vecchio--"

"Oh, clever, Kowalski, very clever. And where the hell were you when we had to live through that trainwreck of a fuckup that was Fraser not being a virgin, huh?"

Ray gestures eloquently with his head: cocky, insouciant, so very this Ray -- there's never any fear of getting the two of them mixed up, in his head or in bed or in any other way. It's incandescent Ray, leaning forward with his teeth bared in a not-quite-smile. "Well, I was being me, Vecchio. Where the fuck were you?"

"I was there," says Ray Vecchio harshly, and he's dark to Ray Kowalski's light. Yin and yang, hot and cool, feeling and thinking, and if the two of them slide, click, fit together like one of Bob Fraser's perfect dovetail joints, then where does that leave Fraser?

"Oh yeah, so you were." Ray lays his hand lightly over Fraser's chest. He's got long, elegant fingers -- musician's fingers, but smudged with carbon and smelling faintly of greased metal. Fraser looks down at them resting just below his left pectoral, the thumb pressing warm and a little moist against the midpoint of his sternum.

He feels the touch echoed on his back: a flat palm, Ray Vecchio's palm, over the ugly knot of scar tissue against his spine.

"Fraser. Fraser. Breathe."

And Fraser breathes, suspended between the two touches. Pilgrims' hands, he thinks, and between them there's a bullet, working its way through his flesh and bone. A sharp point of hate and memory and what had been love, scratching and gnawing until his body's cocooned it with thick, inflexible scar tissue; covered it inside and out, until it's numb.

"Bitch is gone, Benny," says Ray in his ear, and the mattress shifts like the surface of the sea. "But we're here."

"We're here for you, Fraser. You remember that," Ray says quietly, and leans forward and kisses Fraser: presses softly lip to lip, with just a hint of sandpaper.

"Faggot," says Ray Vecchio lightly, when Ray pulls back.

Ray grins. "Jealous, Vecchio?"

"Of you, Kowalski?" Ray snorts. "Not likely."

Ray Kowalski laughs, and shallow curves dip and fluctuate under his ribs and in the lee of his iliac crests. There's none of the soft excesses of the female body about him, and when his hand curls on his thigh, it frames his quiescent cock.

"Jealous of Fraser then, Vecchio?" says Ray, leering. "I'll kiss you too, but it'll cost ya."

"Whoring yourself out, Stanley?" Ray Vecchio asks sardonically. "Am I surprised?"

"Fuck you, Vecchio."

"What can I say? Oh, how about: It'll cost ya?"

Hands take Fraser's face from behind; tilt him around and hold him still for a kiss. Ray Vecchio kisses diffidently: there's more space between them, perhaps, and Ray Kowalski's anchoring hand is gone from Fraser's chest, even though Ray Vecchio's touch has shifted into a half-embrace to compensate.

Ray's observing them with a quirked eyebrow when they break apart. "No wonder your wife left you, Vecchio," he says.

"Your wife left you too, Stanley."

"Yeah, but because I was a loser, not because I sucked in bed."

"Oh, fuck you, Kowalski," Ray says.

Ray Kowalski smiles widely, with teeth. "Watch how it's done, Vecchio."

And Ray Vecchio keeps his arms around Fraser as Ray Kowalski kisses Fraser again: performing for an audience, but devastatingly intent nonetheless. The shared space their mouths occupy is slippery, wet, hot, and Ray's tongue slyly licking Fraser's bottom lip is exciting out of proportion to the mechanics of the actual event. There's the wet velvet texture of Ray's tongue on his lips, on the corner of his mouth -- but Fraser can almost feel a sympathetic sensation on his nipples and on his cock, too: warm-wet-soft slicking cleverly around him, and he wants to relax into it, fall, but instead finds himself thrilling with a harsh, electric buzz that rises and rises and rises.

Ray Vecchio reaches around from behind and plays idly with Fraser's nipples. It's surprisingly erotic, this half-helpless submission to a string of anonymous touches -- but it isn't anonymous, it's Ray -- and Fraser jumps skittishly like a nervous colt, but only once. His nipples are newfound erogenous territory: tingling, sparking, drawing his attention to the two disparate points. The addition is too much, though: his attention divides, splits, recombines into wild and bizarre patterns, trying to take in every touch, every sensation, at once. Ray-this-new-Ray's mouth, kissing with the sort of mildly ironic lewdness of someone who's actually half-amused, and his hands creeping up Fraser's thighs. Ray-the-other-Ray's teeth pressing into Fraser's left shoulder; one cool, sure hand on Fraser's waist; one hand sliding down to close briefly around Fraser's cock, and that's it: it's sensory overload, it's the final cabbage leaf that broke his uncle Tiberius's back, and the inside of Fraser's head spins and spins. He gasps into Ray Kowalski's mouth, and both Rays laugh.

"You should do that to him again," says Ray Kowalski. His knees drift apart as he moves closer, corralling Fraser neatly between their two bodies. Knees touch to either side of Fraser: Ray-in-front's bonier, blond-haired ones knocking against Ray-behind's dark-haired ones, and Fraser himself is as milky and smooth-skinned as a newborn seal, and his knees are rounded and functional.

"No shit," says Ray Vecchio, as pleased as the cat got the cream.

Ray Kowalski goes back to kissing Fraser with admirable thoroughness, and Ray Vecchio's hands slide from Fraser's collarbones to his cock and back again in a manner that leaves Fraser arching frustratedly, chasing something harder, something more.

"C'mere, Vecchio," says Ray huskily, pushing away from Fraser. Their cocks brush briefly as Ray kneels up: a slick, gorgeous dragging sensation down the length of Fraser's cock that expands and flows in a warm rush through his legs and lower belly. The tingles fade into a tantalising ache after a second, and Fraser can't help a soft moan of sheer, unadulterated wanting. Can't help his hand from following the glowing trail beneath his skin, tracing downwards from his navel to fist loosely around the base of his cock. He slides his thumb furtively up to the head and presses, ah, yes-- there, and perhaps he said it out loud because Ray half-stops, turns, and his hand makes a stuttering, abortive gesture towards his own cock.

"Shit, Fraser," is all he says, though.

"For God's sake hurry it up, Kowalski, or he's gonna come without our goddamn help," says Ray Vecchio edgily. He crawls forward on the bed, oddly incongruous in his nakedness.

"You want I should--?"

Ray Vecchio smiles like a shark. "You know, all those times I mentally uttered the phrase: 'suck my cock, Kowalski,' and I never thought tha-- ah, never thought that--" He looks down, face flushing and falling a little slack. "Never thought that, ah, Christ--"

Ray Kowalski turns his head and winks. Fraser sees Ray Vecchio's cock slip wetly between his lips; sees a flash of pink tongue.

The shades are drawn tightly against the hot afternoon sun, but a crack slips through and illuminates the proceedings: the three of them splashed out in a golden, pornographic triptych against the background of a darkened room. The images reel out in Fraser's head even as they play in front of his eyes: he feels dizzy, a little distanced, as though his perspective's slipping and stretching like soft taffy. He can almost see himself watching: see himself pale and glowing against the dust motes, debauched and messy-haired and panting with his hand on his own cock, while over on the far panel of the triptych Ray Kowalski leans forward with his hair haloed brilliantly by the sunlight. Ray Vecchio's bowed head is sharply outlined in silhouette, and his thighs are peppered with dark curls that glint with his shallow upward thrusts.

Above the blood roaring thinly in his ears, Fraser hears Ray Vecchio suddenly gasp.

"Fuck, fuck, stop." Vecchio grabs Ray Kowalski; pulls him off with a wet pop. "Shit, I'm gonna--"

Ray Kowalski sits back on his heels and smirks. "Party ain't even started yet, Vecchio."

"Goddamn, fuck, fuck," says Ray Vecchio, ignoring him and screwing up his eyes into an expression of intense concentration. His wet-tipped cock points at Ray Kowalski and bobs accusingly.

The tension in the bedroom pulls tight: Fraser can feel it tugging in his groin. Tight, hot anticipation that throbs in upward waves with Ray Vecchio's harsh breaths. Rubbing the heel of his hand along his cock only inflames it: it's a hard, sweet ache that builds like pressure behind a concrete dam, rising and rising and rising.

"Okay, okay, not gonna." Ray Vecchio takes a final, deep breath. "You're a pretty good cocksucker, Stanley," he says, with an air of magnanimousness.

"Natural talent," says Ray easily. "You sure you're good to go? Because," he smirks, "yeah, I don't know how much longer Fraser over there can hold out, and I'm thinkin' we could even do it without ya."

Ray Vecchio's eyes narrow, but he only says: "Just gimme the goddamn rubber, Stanley."

Ray grins, flicks him the plastic square from between thumb and forefinger. "Easy, tiger."

And the triptych suddenly folds in on itself like an origami box: Fraser's in the middle and Ray and Ray are enfolding him, drawing him down into the hot, musky space between themselves with warm and cool hands.

"Just relax, Benny," says Ray behind him, and Fraser can feel the rough hair on his legs against the backs of his own; can feel an unfamiliar slick hardness pressing against the lower curve of his buttocks. He knows what it is -- of course he knows what it is -- and the thought shakes him with a desire so intense it blurs his vision until all he can see is light and shadow and light hair and dark hair and Ray.

"Don't think so hard, Fraser," says the Ray in front of him with a crooked smile, and slides gracefully down Fraser's body to take him into that clever, lopsided mouth.

The contact is like the hard jerk of an electric shock. Fraser groans, arches up, comes down onto Ray Vecchio's cock: slide, fit, click, and the three of them are locked together -- Ray, Fraser, Ray, RayFraserRayFraserRay, and Ray Vecchio makes a low sound and his fingers tighten on Fraser's hips. Ray Kowalski cups one hand beneath Fraser's scrotum and his other overlaps with Ray Vecchio's on Fraser's hip: together they're pushing Fraser down, sliding him onto the length of Vecchio's cock, centimetre by slow centimetre.

Fraser's knees drop and touch the bed to either side of Ray Vecchio's, and he's sinking down, seating himself so slowly that the stretch is an exquisitely pleasurable surrender rather than the burn he'd been half-expecting. Ray's inside him, and Fraser can feel himself moulded around that wonderful hardness, his body changing and yielding and shaping itself to the intrusion.

Ray Kowalski flicks his tongue once, twice, and Fraser bites his lip and lets his shaking thigh muscles drop him the last inch. And oh, god, he's filled, impaled, open, and Ray Vecchio's as solid as a rock, letting Fraser shiver and tremble around him.

"Yeah, Benny," says Ray huskily, "yeah."

Ray Kowalski doesn't say anything, but he squeezes Fraser's hip and licks in a swirling, circular pattern that leaves Fraser breathless and arching minutely towards the sensation. And arching towards Ray's mouth means that Fraser slides just a fraction up Ray Vecchio's cock, and then Ray Vecchio thrusts up and the head of his cock hits some spot deep within Fraser that makes Fraser see briefly stars, convulse and say hoarsely in a voice that doesn't seem his own: "Oh, Ray--"

"Shit, Benny," says Ray Vecchio, breathing fast. He pulls Fraser's hips towards him, starting up a rhythm that leaves Fraser moaning helplessly on each upstroke.

Ray Kowalski replaces his mouth with his palm, and his lips are reddened and wet. "Holy fuck, Fraser," he says, and he's jerking Fraser fast and hard in a perfect counterpoint to Ray Vecchio's thrusts. "You should see yourself. You're -- oh god, you're the perfect wet dream, with your mouth open like that and, god, your thighs -- I can actually see Vecchio fucking you, I can see his cock, and you've got this expression on your face like you can't even remember your own goddamned name--"

Fraser feels like he's being fucked from the inside and the outside, like he's just a thin two-dimensional strip of nerve endings being rubbed between Ray's cock and Ray's hand, and it's all one tight, spiralling wave of pleasure upon pleasure, ramping up and up and up--

-- and the pleasure hits a peak that Fraser thinks is just another one on the way up, but it's not because it's the top, it's every nerve ending in his body firing at once and he arches gasping into Ray's hand. His legs give out, Ray Vecchio thrusts upwards and Fraser's orgasm is jerked out of him from the inside out, starting deep at the base of his spine and shuddering, spasming its way outwards into the hot, just-rough just-right friction of Ray's hand.

Ray Kowalski makes a choking noise and grabs for his own cock with the hand that isn't on Fraser. Ray Vecchio's breathing has deteriorated into a series of stuttering gasps that doesn't quite match the rhythm of his thrusts, and Fraser feels Vecchio's thighs shaking with pleasure and with the effort of holding on until they're both oh-god-there--

"Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray, oh god, Ray," says Fraser, and comes.

***

Fraser's asleep -- or very nearly -- and Ray and Ray are talking quietly in the background. The bed bumps: someone swinging his legs over the side, leaning down to pull on a shoe.

"Don't be an asshole, Vecchio," says Ray.

"I don't know about you, Kowalski -- and for what the hell I know, you could be fucking men all the goddamned time -- but I need some time to process what just happened, okay?"

"You need some time to process?" Ray sounds incredulous. "So you fucked your best friend, 'cause you care about him. You're gonna go process that in a glass of scotch? 'Cause I gotta tell you, he's gonna feel real great when he wakes up to find that you've had a freakout and can't look him in the eye anymore -- and whatcha gonna say to that? Oh, sorry, Benny, guess you just must have slipped, tripped, fell on my dick, can we just be friends now, no hard feelings?"

"Fuck off, Kowalski."

The bed shifts, there's a silence, and then Ray finally says, "Come back to bed, Ray."

"Look," says Ray Vecchio, sounding tired, "I'm not a fag, Ray. I like women. I did this because--"

"--because you love Fraser," says Ray simply. "I love him too -- and you know what, Vecchio? He needs us more than you need your fucking macho posturing -- so get back into bed, okay?"

There's a sigh, and then a corner of the bed dips. "I don't like you, Kowalski."

"Yeah, well, mutual."

Someone crawls into the bed behind Fraser, holds up the covers for someone else to reluctantly roll under them. It's Ray Kowalski's shoulder pressing warmly against Fraser's back -- and for all his diffidence, Ray Vecchio is barely a hand's breadth away from Fraser's chest, tall and lanky and musky with the scent of all three of them on his skin.

"You think this is kind of fucked up?" says Ray quietly to Ray.

"I think you're kind of fucked up."

Ray Vecchio snorts at that, rolls onto his side and loops an arm around Fraser's waist. "I'm doing it for him, Kowalski, not for you, you understand?" he says.

Ray Kowalski's hand gently traces the curve of Fraser's bicep. "I'm doing it for him too, Vecchio."

And perhaps they keep talking after that, but it's so very easy to just drift within the closed circle of their arms. It's a warm, familiar closeness that reminds Fraser of something he can't quite place -- and between one breath and the next, he falls asleep.



Criticism makes Ineke grow! Like a, er, flower!

Comments

[aerye.livejournal.com]

Oh, baby, baby, baby--this is just splendid! I am mush, mushy and happy and kinda tingly all over and really, you should do this more often. Really.

Yes!

[ineke.livejournal.com]

As Queen of the Rays, I am all sorts of pleased that you didn't feel the need to fall upon your spork at my depiction of the Ray/Ray *g*. And sweetie, you pimp so nice! That comment in your journal just made me beam. Thank you!

[lamardeuse.livejournal.com]

Excuse me? You want criticism? Like, coherent, well-thought-out criticism?

Well, missy, that's pretty hard to do when your brain is melted.

And may I just add:

Guh. Holy. FUCK. Teh hotness.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Heh, I'm glad it melted your brain. And it sure as hell melted mine, but I suspect in an entirely different kind of way *g*.

[sister-wolf.livejournal.com]

But this is so far beyond gratuitous porn-- it's, like, in another galaxy-- where the hell do I start? First off-- gorgeous imagery (A sharp point of hate and memory and what had been love, scratching and gnawing until his body's cocooned it with thick, inflexible scar tissue; covered it inside and out, until it's numb-- and the triptych image, which I won't quote because I would have to quote the entire paragraph. And then there's the characterisation, which made me believe that Ray and Ray would do this for Fraser-- the love, and the bickering, and the friction, and the completely believable RayV near-freakout... loveliness. Sheer fucking loveliness.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

The triptych image! I shoved that in because I was afraid they were kind of floating on a big bed in a grey void, you know? Hey, kind of like in that Buffy episode, where Riley and Buffy can't stop having sex *g*. Just like that, in fact. But I quite like the triptych image -- I was sort of going for the Caravaggio, and perhaps I should've found a way to squeeze in the word chiaroscuro, because that's a neater way of saying the whole thing, and something Fraser would definitely know.

I'm still a little hunh about the Fraser characterisation -- and in fact, I don't have a Fraser voice, which annoys me -- but I'm beyond glad that you found the Rays believable.

Thanks for the comment!

[the-star-fish.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah, baby. Just like that.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

I figured you weren't awake, and I was like: fuck it! I'll do it without beta! I'll post it right this goddamned minute!

And of course, this morning I'm picking out all sorts of detritus and spelling mistakes and going, "fuck, fuck, I shoulda got a beta."

*grins*. But I'm glad you liked it, baby.

[umbo.livejournal.com]

Beautifully written.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Shell!

[akite.livejournal.com]

All of it was marvelous, but this bit:

it's sensory overload, it's the final cabbage leaf that broke his uncle Tiberius's back

It was perfect. Now grow, little flower, grow. :g:

[ineke.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Aw, I was going to cut that line! I was reading it over right before I posted, all bleary eyes and nyyyergh, and I was like, "what? That makes no sense at all -- cabbage leaf? Tiberius? What kind of crack was I on when I wrote that sentence?"

Thanks for the comment, sweetie :)

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

Holy fucking shit, this is delicious. Hot and snarky and just right. Wow.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

The Rays are all about the snark, aren't they? I thought maybe I went overboard (no characterisation? Insert snark here!), and then after that, I worried that perhaps I was just using Vecchio for his snark and his cock. But I think in the end he actually wrangled a better deal than RayK *g*. After all, he got to fuck Fraser, yeah?

[elmyraemilie.livejournal.com]

"You should see yourself. You're -- oh god, you're the perfect wet dream, with your mouth open like that and, god, your thighs -- I can actually see Vecchio fucking you, I can see his cock, and you've got this expression on your face like you can't even remember your own goddamned name--"

Holy shit. This is exquisite. RayK being visual, RayV being tactile. Playing the two of them off each other with love for Ben in the middle. Too sweet, too good when RayK shames RayV into staying.

Jeezus, just the fact that you wrote a whole story in which two of the character have the same fuckin' name and I didn't get confused even once blows me away.

Guh. Me-too. Whatever fertilizer you want, lovely flower.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Oh god, slash is bad enough with the pronoun problem -- but two men with the same name? Both of whom Fraser thinks of as Ray?

It was a nightmare.

And yes, RayK is the visual one, isn't he? I'd sort of orginally conceived him as the vocal, emotional one -- I was going to have him talking constantly throughout, doing most of the reassurance while Vecchio did most of the fucking. And afterwards, Vecchio would've all been, "Hey Stanley, what are you, a fucking woman or something? 'Cause you never shut up during sex, you know that?"

But hey, then RayK got a cock in his mouth, and it was kind of hard to make him talk *g*.

[laurashapiro.livejournal.com]

Oh, the sweet, delicious *pain*. Yowch. Yes. As has been said, this is way beyond pure porn. There's deep stuff here, and it's the *right* deep stuff. I can totally see this happening, just like this.

Yow.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Oh sweetie, thanks! I did find this one difficult because -- well, I think as resonant8 said, it's bloody near impossible to do this pairing (er, threesome) without 100k of backstory. I tried to give it a bit of emotional backstory, but I do wish that I'd been able to do more, and more concisely. But I'm glad that you found enough in it to make it plausible!

[laurakaye.livejournal.com]

*twitches*

guuuuuuuuuuuuuh.

*attempts to scrape up coherence*

I just, wow. That was. Yes. Hot, yes, but so much MORE than hot. And Vecchio, and Kowalski, and yes. Very much so, yes.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Ahahah, thank you! *picks Laura up off the floor*. Your incoherence is the sweetest compliment, my dear!

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

What the hell are you apologizing for, you freak? Man, I *love* this; it's hot, and it feels *right*, and oh man does it push all my buttons of Fraser adoration. Because ... Fraser. Mmmm.

*loves on ineke*

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Does this mean you owe me a snippet, now? *evil, evil smile* C'mon, drop and gimme boys with toys, baby!

And yeah, this story? I'm, well, kind of happy because: yay, I finished something! (Goddamn!) But I'm a lot more frustrated with the not-quiteness of it: I really wanted to do more with the characters. Vecchio's denial, Fraser's emotional scars, Ray's -- well, Ray's love, 'cause Ray is in love with Fraser, you know?

Some time after this story, Vecchio drops out of the picture and it's just F/K all the way, baby *g*.

[persian-slipper.livejournal.com]

I love you, I love you, I love you.

I've had this *exact* bunny hopping around in my brain for a week now, and you've taken it and fed it and played with it and made it into the rabbit that ate Manhattan.

And melted brains. Including mine.

It's *good*, and *hot*, and *in character*, and that's exactly how they would have sex, and did I mention I love your Fraser?

It's good, sweetie, really good.

P.S. How did they get Fraser into bed? I can see Ray and Ray planning this, but Fraser's a bit harder to visualize.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

And I love you too! *kiss*. Thank you for commenting!

Ah, Fraser. Fraser, Fraser, Fraser, the thorn in my side. It's weird -- 'cause, you know, I consider DS to be my primary fandom -- but I don't have voices for any of these characters, not really. I kind of fake it, and I think you can tell. The Ray/Ray snark, the Fraser's dad references: it's all my desperate attempts to make it sound like them. Whereas, HP? I have a Sirius and a Remus, and they chat away quite naturally without me having to force it. But I just can't get a handle on Fraser! Especially S3 Fraser, who's all sorts of contradictions.

I'm more of a S1 Fraser girl, myself *g*. Only S1 Fraser with RayK, natch.

How did they get Fraser into bed?

Ahahaha *cough*. I write on the time-honoured tradition: in medias res is the lazy writer's best friend! Which basically means: goddamn, I have no idea *g*. It'd need 100k of backstory to make it work, that's for sure.

[twistedchick]

::shivers::

This is good.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked it! And thanks for commenting :)

[lynnmonster.livejournal.com]

Ooooooh -- this was muy caliente, and your Ray voices are just wonderful.

I want to know more about how *Fraser* is reacting, and how they got to that place; why they feel like Fraser needs this from them. But this part you gave us here is just, wow.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Ah, Fraser. You're absolutely right: this story does kind of drift out of Fraser's head -- there's not enough of his reactions to the situation, as opposed to the sex. I think it happened because I was just writing on a lick, spit and a promise. I just threw 'em all in together and hoped something would come out of the mix -- but in not focusing on why, I think the emotions (Fraser's especially) came out kind of grey. What this story needs is a clear moment when Fraser thinks: this is where I belong, right? To allay that earlier fear that Ray and Ray are complete and happy without him.

As I was discussing with Pearl above, I think this really is just a scene of a much longer story -- and that's where the character development should be.

Thanks for the comment, sweetheart!

Ineke grows! Like a flower! Or, perhaps a small shrub!

[estrella30.livejournal.com]

This is really wonderful, ineke! I particularly loved this bit:

"I was there," says Ray Vecchio harshly, and he's dark to Ray Kowalski's light. Yin and yang, hot and cool, feeling and thinking, and if the two of them slide, click, fit together like one of Bob Fraser's perfect dovetail joints, then where does that leave Fraser?

Because - yeah. Wow. Really nice.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Heh, I just love the sound of that sentence: slide, click, fit! I was originally going for that tick-tick-tick sound of lacquer jigsaw puzzle pieces hitting each other, but then I thought that perhaps I needed something to make it a bit more Fraser. Er, so hence the dodgy dovetail joint metaphor.

But I'm glad you liked the story! Porny Ray goodness, eh?

[lovessong.livejournal.com]

I love this. Your brain might be melted, but I think you & flashfiction go together beautifully.

My favorite part is the end, with Ray and Ray discussion, and the Fraser pov works wonderfully.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Awww, thank you! I think my main problem with flashfiction is that I naturally write slowly -- and if I feel pressured, I panic and prod and poke and everything gets overworked. Tough and chewy, like an over-kneaded bread dough!

I think the bit at the end shows how much of an F/K shipper I really am. It's a little clumsy, but I was trying to show that Vecchio's there more out of a sense of duty, and Kowalski's there out of love. They both have very different character motivations (well, they would, had I written it more clearly), and ultimately, it's RayK who'll stay with Fraser while Vecchio moves on.

[raveninthewind.livejournal.com]

Mwah! I love you. I was hankering for a new DS threesome, and there's Ray/Ray snark as a bonus! :D

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Hee, thank you! And I have to admit that in Ray/Ray stories I do get off on the snark rather than the sex ;)

I'm almost afraid to ask what other threesomes you've been reading in this fandom *g*.

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

I know F/K is your favorite pairing, and I know Vecchio is doing this out of love for Fraser, but what actually struck me is the Ray/Ray interaction in this fabulous story. Because beyond the snark and the sniping, I am seeing the connection between the two of them. Perhaps it's engendered by love and concern for the Mountie, but it links them in a different but equally intimate way that transcends Fraser. I think they all really love each other more than they would admit. And whether or not the story ends us F/K, I am deeply moved by Vecchio, and how he and Kowalski share intimacy, too.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Absolutely! The way I see it, the snark and sniping between the Rays is indicative of their bond, rather than a cover for it -- it's a familiarity, a back-and-forth that doesn't necessarily need Fraser, although in this story he's obviously the catalyst. And, well, I guess an implication of this story is the fact that they've worked together to get this whole situation to even occur in the first place -- their connection goes a long way back, I think. There's Fraser, who's kind of alienated, and then the two Rays, and this story is the little piece that ties all three of them them back together.

Actually, this whole thing first presented itself to me as a Ray/Ray (which was rather bizarre, considering my preferences *g*): I just got a flash of the two Rays sitting on a bed, naked, snarking at each other. And that just warmed the cockles of my little heart *g*.

Thanks for your super-brainy insight, Shay! *kiss*

[tyk.livejournal.com]

oh my. so many comments made already that i don't want to copy. but the Ray voices in this are, to me, just awesome. much more than porn :>

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm so happy that you liked the Ray voices! I do think they're a lot clearer than the Fraser voice -- and as a bonus, they were incredibly fun to write *g*.

Thank you!

[chesamus.livejournal.com]

Mr. Vecchio has some serious denial going here, doesn't he? This is simply marvelous!

[ineke.livejournal.com]

In the version that was floating around in my head, I'd actually made a much larger point of Vecchio's supposed straightness -- I think mainly to emphasise the difference between the Rays. It was less clear in this written version, perhaps because I was afraid of getting sidetracked. But still, Vecchio's making what he thinks is a huge sacrifice -- which goes to show a measure of his love for Fraser. And his freakout is probably because he overthinks it: he thinks that he should freak out; that that's the natural response to such a situation. But he's easily persuaded back into bed, 'cause really? It wasn't half as bad as he'd thought *g*.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

God. That was just breathtakingly original. Sexy, tense, perfectly in character -- and I've never read sex written like that. Just wow.

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, thank you! (That means so much to me!) And you know, you set the standard with your Triosmut *g*. As I was writing this, I kept getting moments of horrible, horrible doubt whenever I remembered how smoothly and effortlessly your threesome porn flowed. And I was absolutely cursing the fact that men (unlike Hermione) can't have multiple orgasms *laugh*.

[damned-colonial.livejournal.com]

Dear. Sweet. Lord.

*falls down*

(here via a rec from makesmewannadie, btw)

[ineke.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you! People falling down from my porn is always the greatest compliment *g*.

I wish I'd done more with this one -- more, and better! (fixing Fraser's POV would've been a great start) -- but I'm glad you liked it. And such are the perils of flashfiction, eh?

[(Anonymous)]

ahhh, livejournal. you're such a little bitch.
just got done thanking you for such a great fic, and of course lj done et my comment.

this fic is so very hot; easily the hottest threesome fic i've read in any fandom. and it's also a pleasure to read for the writing. in particular, i like the juxtapostion of fraser's dreamy observations with the great snark of both rays.
i know you wrote this a while ago, but i just came across it and i wanted you to know that it's just as much a pleasure for people who are finding it now as it was for those who got it fresh off the flashfiction press.
thank you very much - tally

[spuffyduds.livejournal.com]

Oh, this is astonishingly hot and sweet and lovely. The bullet between the two Rays' hands--oh my.

[annieroo2.livejournal.com]

*fans self* Oh yeah that was a great way to spend my time. :D