In the Basement

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

For the hourglass challenge...



The big black car stops at the end of the driveway. Ray doesn’t pull up any closer. Barbara Kowalski is planting zinnias in the little garden out front. Ray’s father is nowhere in sight, but he’s around somewhere.

Fraser looks at the tense man behind the wheel, and his own brow wrinkles. “Ray?”

“Just…give me a minute, Fraser.” He pinches his eyes between two long fingers and breathes deeply. “I’m okay. Really. I can do this.”

“Ray.” Fraser leans in to his friend, his partner, his lover. “We don’t have to do this today. We can just have dinner with them. We needn’t tell them if you don’t want to. It can wait.”

“No.” Ray shakes his head. “I’ve waited too long. They have to know. I want them to know.” He’s looking at the double-wide, at the homey domestic scene before him, but he’s not seeing it.

“Ray,” Fraser says, his own heartbeat escalating. He puts a steady hand on the other man’s trembling shoulder. Ray doesn’t move, doesn’t seem to feel Fraser’s touch. “Ray. Ray. What is it? Where are you?”

The voice answering is soft, higher than Ray’s usual pitch. Adolescent. “In the basement. In the basement.”

“Tell me,” Fraser begs. “Tell me.”

. . .he’s in the basement, and he’s caught. Caught with Stevie’s mouth wrapped around his dick, with his hand in Stevie’s pants. The lights snap on suddenly. His parents weren’t supposed to be back, not for hours, but there they are. His erection doesn’t wilt; he’s fifteen and hormones won’t let it. He sees them, sees the look of shock and disgust in their eyes and he comes anyway, spurting onto Stevie’s face as his friend pulls away in terror, to be grabbed by the collar and shoved towards the door. He’s shoved onto the couch. There are words, ugly words, words like unnatural and disgusting and faggot and queer and not our son and never trusted you. And then a door slams behind one of them and he’s left alone with the other and he knows he’s in for it, he knows what to expect, but it’s worse this time, it’s never been this bad; this time it’s more than slaps and a raised welt or two, this time a belt is used, and a shoe, and he’s hit so hard in the face that his glasses go flying and smash against the unfinished cinderblock wall and his eye begins to swell and his teeth feel loose. There’ll be no school, not for a few days, maybe more than a few, not until he won’t have to make up a reason for the bruises.

“Oh, God,” Fraser says. He feels sick. He wants to get out of the car and run, run right up to the door and beat the person who did that to a teenage boy. He doesn’t. Now it’s Ray whose hand reaches out. Fraser looks up into Ray’s eyes, and Ray looks strangely calm now.

“It’s okay, Fraser.”

“It’s not. It’s not okay. It’s not right.”

“No,” Ray admits, and lets out his breath in a long hiss. “They were pretty relieved when I got serious about Stella, as you can imagine.”

“Yes.” Fraser smiles grimly. He looks up at the trailer. Damian Kowalski is coming around the side of the building, a hose in his hand. “I don’t know how you can even look at him now. I don’t care how shocked or disappointed he was. How could a father do such a thing to his own son?”

Ray looks out the window, blinking rapidly. Barbara Kowalski has noticed them, and a motherly smile breaks out on her plump face. She waves at them, starts towards the car.

“No, Fraser,” Ray says, quietly, so quietly that he is barely audible. “Not him. Not my father.”

Comments

Wow!

[lmondegreen.livejournal.com]

What a startling twist!

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

Powerful story. It's a very different way of looking at Barbara.

;_;

[dementia-12.livejournal.com]

Barbara, noooo! ;_;

Good twist! Great story!

Re: ;_;

[dementia-12.livejournal.com]

My sister does the same thing but usually for no reason at all. ^_^;;

[ajinamoto.livejournal.com]

Wonderful story, great surprise ending. Who'da thunk it?

[mei-x.livejournal.com]

Wow is right. I really liked this, and I was surprised by the ending.

[akite.livejournal.com]

Dang, Shay! What a shocker! Eeeee! So good.

[moxie-brown.livejournal.com]

It's like this PSA I saw where this biker was snatching this little girl not to molest her or anything but to protect her from her abusive mother.

Okay, so we get weird PSA here in Texas, but I really liked the ending! I never did trust those grandmotherly types. Wholesome my ass.

[maubast.livejournal.com]

Lovely twist. Awesome.

[taylor-serenil.livejournal.com]

I did *not* see that twist coming at all. Maybe it's too much fanon where Damian has way more difficulty with RayK being something other than completely straight, or maybe it's just knowing that moms *tend* to freak less about their gay/bi/whatever kids, but I would never have expected Barbara to be the one to deliver that kind of a physical beating. Emotional, maybe, physical no. Good story.

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

A friend in High School had a mother who was so sweet to all of us, and at night drank herself into a stupor and slapped the kids around. I guess I never got over that image of once coming over when Mrs. P was "under the weather." She was verbally abusive to me and grabbed my friend by the arm so hard that later I saw the bruises. I guess I was pretty sheltered -- I never expected a mother to do that, either.

[jenboo.livejournal.com]

Oh, my! Shay, you're breaking my heart, here! Poor Ray!
I can feel the dread in Ray and the worry in Fraser. A really visceral piece.
But I have to tell you, I've read it three times now, hoping each time that the end will be different. Of course, I'm the chick who watches West Side Story for the 20th time and yells "Chino's got a gun!" at Tony. *g*

[lamardeuse.livejournal.com]

Oh. Holy. Shit. Wow. Okay. My.

This is one of those ones you just gobble down, it hooks you so completely.

OMG

[(Anonymous)]

And you know, I was so ditzed that the first time I read it I thought it was *Stevie's* father. Because it didn't even occur to me that anybody's mother would do such a thing. Even though I know perfectly well that it happens. And of course Ray would lift a hand against his own mother.

Karen

Re: OMG

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

That's the thing. I can see a universe where a fifteen year old Ray would be big enough and fed up enough to strike back at his father. But his mother? Never.

um, I meant.

[(Anonymous)]

He wouldn't.

--K

[dsudis.livejournal.com]

Chiming in a bit behind the curve to say: Whimper. Must go find a suitable Ray in my brain and hug him. Or. Maybe take a nap, if I'm typing sentences like that...

[helvirago]

Ha! I did suspect! But I'm always on the lookout for deviousness.

This was really good. And ouch ouch ouch. Makes you just want to... just... sigh.

[spacebrat.livejournal.com]

I had a few friends in high school with unstable mothers; my own mom, in fact, was much more physically aggressive with the kids in my family than my stepfather. So this strikes a very powerful chord in me. I think it's very good, and very, very painful. And I love it.

*two big, if slightly weepy, thumbs up*

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

I'm gratified by your comments. Thanks. And two big thumbs up back at you.

SHAY

[pollitt.livejournal.com]

OMG, Shay, this was amazing. And I didn't see the end coming.

That was incredibly powerful -- Bravo!

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much. I seem to be waffling schizophrenically between silly stories and dark stories these days. Not sure why. But I am so happy you liked this.

Re: In the Basement

[yeungmaisu.livejournal.com]

Oh, God. This is so powerful. Shay, brava to you for the honesty and realism here. And thanks for the telling of it.

Didn't See It Coming

[dkellergrl.livejournal.com]

Very good plot twist. I had to re-read the story twice to figure out that Ma Kowalski was the one. That's why she still kept in touch with Stella AFTER the divorce.

Re: Didn't See It Coming

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

That's an interesting point I hadn't even considered. Hmmmm. Barbara staying in touch with Stella. You're very clever.
Thanks!

Interesting Twist

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

And if RayK were to have ever been abused like this, how would that shape his relationship with Stella? And his obsession with her and his struggles to let go? Mentally I am tying this into the bank robbery scene where he humiliated himself to win her love (or was it he humilated himself and then allowed her to think he had done it on purpose to save her). Lots of possibilities there.

Re: Interesting Twist

[murielperun.livejournal.com]

If Stella was the only woman Ray ever loved, and if he got his parents' approval by loving her, he'd feel like less of a man if he couldn't make things work with her. And at the same time, he'd hate himself for trying to be someone he wasn't just to get the approval of someone who abused him.

Ray hates living a lie--and he hated himself for letting Stella think he had peed himself on purpose when he did it out of fear. When Fraser pointed out that she might also have loved Ray for other reasons, it was a big revelation.

Poor Stella in all this--do you think he would tell her what his mother did, or would Fraser be the first?

Re: Interesting Twist

[mergatrude.livejournal.com]

Wow wow wow wow!

... and no - no way could he tell Stella, because he'd have to tell her why his mum hit him, and then she couldn't possibly love him any more, which takes you round to the begining again. (Or am I the only one with a man prone to bizarre circular logic?)

Re: Interesting Twist

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

You know, I'd love to say I thought this all out before I wrote the piece, but you all are prompting some pretty fascinating thoughts. I do know that abused children often defend the abuser and keep currying their approval even in the face of obvious abuse. I imagine that Stella, while not an abuser, was always a pretty strong personality, very demanding, and it is no wonder to me, given the hypothetical storyline, that Ray, whose primary female has abused him, might repeat that pattern in being obsessed with winning Stella's approval. I'm thinking the more Stella tries to separate from him and the more bitchy she becomes (and I don't think she is an evil bitch, just a woman in a marriage that doesn't work) the more desperate he would become, trying to win her love. He doesn't know how to talk to her any more? No. He's given her all the power, and is too afraid to make a mistake. Who know what would have set mom off?

Sheesh. I'm even freaking myself out, now.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Add me to the list of people saying, way cool stuff here! And yeah, it does work with canon--remember Stella and Barbara being so close, now we can really see why, huh? Barbara in this universe would have a hell of a lot invested in Stella, one can only imagine. Powerful stuff.

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I may have to go watch "Easy Money" a few times to recapture my image of Barbara as kindly mother, after what I've done to her here.