...and the sheep are nervous
May. 4th, 2003 11:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
helvirago posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
ds_flashfiction(Having mis-posted this twice, once through livejournal's problems and once through my own stupidity, I'm trying it one. more. time.)
Okay, I'm not terribly impressed with it, but I don't think it's going to get any better. Plus I did a thorough edit twice. The first time it went up by 50 words, the next time it went just below where it was originally, so we've got 1,073. I'll do better next time!
Earlier:
Oh, this was sweet, this was good, this was so much better than doing his homework. Benton dug his fingers into the bony hips before him and drove in deeply, shuddering from the feel of it. He couldn't believe his good fortune. This beautiful skinny stranger with the... impossibly... tight... ass... was the sort of wonderful gift you just couldn't expect to get free.
He thought he should be more concerned for his partner's comfort, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to ask. In any event, the man didn't seem to be complaining, just moaning and grunting and pushing back against him and occasionally asking him to thrust harder.
How wonderful! Benton released one hip in order to grab at the man's penis, never faltering in his rhythm. The man yelped at Benton's touch, but immediately thrust forward into his palm and then backward again, pushing hard into Benton's hips.
He was close, very very close, and Benton tightened his grasp and stroked harder, thrusting in a counterpoint which pushed them ever harder against the brick wall before them, all the while urged on by the blond's murmured, "Oh yeah, man... oh fuck, yeah... oh god, fuck..."
Entirely too soon, it seemed, the young man, on the verge of obeying Benton's whispered commands, tightened his muscles, causing Benton to gasp and grip harder as he thrust helplessly, coming and coming and coming as the man he was inside muffled a scream and came all over the wall.
Leaning his head against the back of the other man's, Benton fished out a handkerchief and handed it off before letting himself slump over the man's back. He took a deep breath and carefully disengaged, removing the condom and wrapping it in another handkerchief for later disposal. He accepted the first handkerchief back with a murmured "Thank you" and straightened his clothing before looking up to find the young man staring at him. His gaze was somewhat unnerving, as was his continued energy -- after what they'd just done, how could he look so... jittery? Benton felt he barely had the energy to stand still and be polite.
"So, uh... thanks."
"No, um, thank you. Could I, um." Benton thumbed his eyebrow, wondering why his grandmother's etiquette books had never covered this situation. "Offer you a drink of some kind? Or..." he knew he sounded as lost as he felt, but he couldn't think of what to say.
It seemed he was understood nonetheless. A quick grin flashed across the man's face. "No. 'Snice of you. But I gotta go. Got some friends to meet and a long drive in front of me."
"Ah, so you're not a native of Oskana-Ka-asateki?" Benton asked, and immediately regretted it, as the man drew back a bit. He couldn't even keep total strangers from thinking him strange.
"Uh, no. I don't think so, anyway." The man paused. "It's just, Jack's gotta be back in Minneapolis by tomorrow afternoon, so we've gotta haul ass. Uh... hurry." Benton wondered what on earth was on his face to make the man who had minutes before been moaning "fuck me harder" amend his language. Apparently he also saw the incongruity, because he gave another quick grin before continuing. "Anyway, we said we'd meet up in front of the club, uh," he glanced at his wrist, "now, and I'm driving first shift. But thanks."
Benton smiled, just as glad not to have to continue to make polite conversation. Although he wouldn't at all have minded repeating the earlier conversation -- sex, unlike conversation, could be done largely by instinct. "Well, drive safely." Idiot, he berated himself, are you his mother? "It was a pleasure to have met you," and he extended his hand. When in doubt, fall back on the rules you know, and this one he knew.
The other man looked at his hand, then to his face again, a grin twisting his mouth as he shook Benton's hand. "Yeah, well. Pleasure's all mine. Really."
Benton gave him directions back to the bar from which he'd wandered and headed back to try his luck at sneaking in undetected, as his roommate seemed to have no trouble doing.
Later:
"Really, Ray, I would prefer it if you would watch the road."
"All right, all right. Just pop this tape in, okay?" Fraser glanced at the label as he inserted the tape, then flinched as it began to play.
"Yeah, that's it." Ray began tapping on the wheel and dancing in his seat as a harsh voice yelled from the speakers.
"You know, Ray," Fraser shouted over the noise, "This is a Canadian group."
"Yeah, I know. Actually went up to see them once. Me and Stella and some friends of ours. Made a roadtrip."
"Ah. And... did you enjoy it? They sound... energetic."
Ray glanced over at him, smile a broad slash under his sunglasses. "What are you, my mother? 'Energetic'?"
"I merely meant..."
"Yeah, I know. I'm just joking with you." He reached over and turned down the volume so that Fraser could no longer hear the crowd in the background but only the musicians themselves. "Actually, I never made it to the show. We get up there, Stella and I have this huge fight, she throws her ring at me, I storm off."
"Ah."
"No, don't 'ah' me, Fraser, it was fine. We meet up after the show and for some reason she's all turned on, she gives the guys money to go have a couple beers and jumps me in the back seat of the Goat."
Fraser turned involuntarily to glance behind him before he caught himself.
"You must have been disappointed to miss the performance."
"Nah, like I said. It was fine." A grin crept slowly across his face. "I, uh, wandered around Regina. Saw the sights."
"Ah yes. The river is quite lovely, and as I recall there are some lovely parks, and of course the Government House Museum."
"Yeah, I remember a river." Ray sounded distracted. "And some buildings. Building, anyway. It was made out of brick." If possible, his smile stretched wider. "Anyway, I just kind of wandered around, stayed awake. Had to get one of the guys to Minneapolis by morning."
After a moment of silence, Ray turned to look at Fraser. "What's up, Frase?"
Fraser swallowed loudly and said, "Did I ever mention that the RCMP Depot Division is in Regina, Ray?"
Okay, I'm not terribly impressed with it, but I don't think it's going to get any better. Plus I did a thorough edit twice. The first time it went up by 50 words, the next time it went just below where it was originally, so we've got 1,073. I'll do better next time!
Earlier:
Oh, this was sweet, this was good, this was so much better than doing his homework. Benton dug his fingers into the bony hips before him and drove in deeply, shuddering from the feel of it. He couldn't believe his good fortune. This beautiful skinny stranger with the... impossibly... tight... ass... was the sort of wonderful gift you just couldn't expect to get free.
He thought he should be more concerned for his partner's comfort, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to ask. In any event, the man didn't seem to be complaining, just moaning and grunting and pushing back against him and occasionally asking him to thrust harder.
How wonderful! Benton released one hip in order to grab at the man's penis, never faltering in his rhythm. The man yelped at Benton's touch, but immediately thrust forward into his palm and then backward again, pushing hard into Benton's hips.
He was close, very very close, and Benton tightened his grasp and stroked harder, thrusting in a counterpoint which pushed them ever harder against the brick wall before them, all the while urged on by the blond's murmured, "Oh yeah, man... oh fuck, yeah... oh god, fuck..."
Entirely too soon, it seemed, the young man, on the verge of obeying Benton's whispered commands, tightened his muscles, causing Benton to gasp and grip harder as he thrust helplessly, coming and coming and coming as the man he was inside muffled a scream and came all over the wall.
Leaning his head against the back of the other man's, Benton fished out a handkerchief and handed it off before letting himself slump over the man's back. He took a deep breath and carefully disengaged, removing the condom and wrapping it in another handkerchief for later disposal. He accepted the first handkerchief back with a murmured "Thank you" and straightened his clothing before looking up to find the young man staring at him. His gaze was somewhat unnerving, as was his continued energy -- after what they'd just done, how could he look so... jittery? Benton felt he barely had the energy to stand still and be polite.
"So, uh... thanks."
"No, um, thank you. Could I, um." Benton thumbed his eyebrow, wondering why his grandmother's etiquette books had never covered this situation. "Offer you a drink of some kind? Or..." he knew he sounded as lost as he felt, but he couldn't think of what to say.
It seemed he was understood nonetheless. A quick grin flashed across the man's face. "No. 'Snice of you. But I gotta go. Got some friends to meet and a long drive in front of me."
"Ah, so you're not a native of Oskana-Ka-asateki?" Benton asked, and immediately regretted it, as the man drew back a bit. He couldn't even keep total strangers from thinking him strange.
"Uh, no. I don't think so, anyway." The man paused. "It's just, Jack's gotta be back in Minneapolis by tomorrow afternoon, so we've gotta haul ass. Uh... hurry." Benton wondered what on earth was on his face to make the man who had minutes before been moaning "fuck me harder" amend his language. Apparently he also saw the incongruity, because he gave another quick grin before continuing. "Anyway, we said we'd meet up in front of the club, uh," he glanced at his wrist, "now, and I'm driving first shift. But thanks."
Benton smiled, just as glad not to have to continue to make polite conversation. Although he wouldn't at all have minded repeating the earlier conversation -- sex, unlike conversation, could be done largely by instinct. "Well, drive safely." Idiot, he berated himself, are you his mother? "It was a pleasure to have met you," and he extended his hand. When in doubt, fall back on the rules you know, and this one he knew.
The other man looked at his hand, then to his face again, a grin twisting his mouth as he shook Benton's hand. "Yeah, well. Pleasure's all mine. Really."
Benton gave him directions back to the bar from which he'd wandered and headed back to try his luck at sneaking in undetected, as his roommate seemed to have no trouble doing.
Later:
"Really, Ray, I would prefer it if you would watch the road."
"All right, all right. Just pop this tape in, okay?" Fraser glanced at the label as he inserted the tape, then flinched as it began to play.
"Yeah, that's it." Ray began tapping on the wheel and dancing in his seat as a harsh voice yelled from the speakers.
"You know, Ray," Fraser shouted over the noise, "This is a Canadian group."
"Yeah, I know. Actually went up to see them once. Me and Stella and some friends of ours. Made a roadtrip."
"Ah. And... did you enjoy it? They sound... energetic."
Ray glanced over at him, smile a broad slash under his sunglasses. "What are you, my mother? 'Energetic'?"
"I merely meant..."
"Yeah, I know. I'm just joking with you." He reached over and turned down the volume so that Fraser could no longer hear the crowd in the background but only the musicians themselves. "Actually, I never made it to the show. We get up there, Stella and I have this huge fight, she throws her ring at me, I storm off."
"Ah."
"No, don't 'ah' me, Fraser, it was fine. We meet up after the show and for some reason she's all turned on, she gives the guys money to go have a couple beers and jumps me in the back seat of the Goat."
Fraser turned involuntarily to glance behind him before he caught himself.
"You must have been disappointed to miss the performance."
"Nah, like I said. It was fine." A grin crept slowly across his face. "I, uh, wandered around Regina. Saw the sights."
"Ah yes. The river is quite lovely, and as I recall there are some lovely parks, and of course the Government House Museum."
"Yeah, I remember a river." Ray sounded distracted. "And some buildings. Building, anyway. It was made out of brick." If possible, his smile stretched wider. "Anyway, I just kind of wandered around, stayed awake. Had to get one of the guys to Minneapolis by morning."
After a moment of silence, Ray turned to look at Fraser. "What's up, Frase?"
Fraser swallowed loudly and said, "Did I ever mention that the RCMP Depot Division is in Regina, Ray?"
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-05-04 09:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 07:11 pm (UTC)It totally is! Just... not by me.
I'm so much more angsty-introspective than plotty-conversational that writing just this exhausted me (and required rather more whiskey that I should have indulged) -- and there was very little conversation in this! I myself would also love to see what happens next, especially since that fucking-a-stranger part of Fraser's gotta still be in there, right?
So thank you!
no subject
Date: 2003-05-04 09:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 08:28 am (UTC)I want to see more of this Fraser too! I have no idea what he was thinking!
no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 10:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-04 09:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 08:29 am (UTC)Thank you! It was immense fun to write.
no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 12:18 am (UTC)(Moments later) Ray drops Fraser off at the Consulate and stops inside to pick up a file they'd been working on earlier that day. Fraser, ever the polite host, says, "Could I, um, offer you a drink of some kind, or..." Ray does a double take, and his eyes widen...
*g*
*Very* cool story.
no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 08:31 am (UTC)Hee. So much fun. Thank you.
no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 03:36 am (UTC)(reedy little Oliver Twist voice)
Please, ma'am, may I have another?
no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 07:17 pm (UTC)Oh, Oliver Twist. Oops. Ahem. "Moooore? You ask for mooooorrre?"
Thank you very kindly.
So what band did Ray not see?
Date: 2003-05-05 03:45 am (UTC)This was such fun!
Re: So what band did Ray not see?
Date: 2003-05-05 08:32 am (UTC)Re: So what band did Ray not see?
Date: 2003-05-05 11:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 03:53 am (UTC)And my bet for the band is Hard Core Logo ... just because ...
It was probably right after that when Stella convinced Ray he needed a tattoo, right?
Re:
Date: 2003-05-05 06:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 07:10 am (UTC)We need more Depot!Fraser in this world, thank you kindly.
Re: ...and the sheep are nervous
Date: 2003-05-05 07:13 am (UTC)Re: ...and the sheep are nervous
Date: 2003-05-05 06:51 pm (UTC)Okay, I know that sounds like, "Please, praise me more!" But it's more like... I can see the characters doing it, there's something about them that informs the idea, but I don't know what it is! So I'm curious about what other people see in them that makes this plausible.
And also, of course, thank you! I'm all a-blush.
Re: ...and the sheep are nervous
Date: 2003-05-05 08:19 pm (UTC)Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I find Fraser to be passive-aggressive. And passive-aggressive personalities generally want to be good more than anything else, so that the people they love will love them in return. However, because of the nature of their passivity, they can and do display a lack of polish or skill in social situations while at the same time, their aggression will surface in unexpected ways. And you manage to show both of these traits beautifully here; the aggressiveness in the way he's not at all concerned with Ray's sexual gratification yet the passivity in the tender awkwardness afterward. It's a very compelling portrait.
Re: ...and the sheep are nervous
Date: 2003-05-05 08:50 pm (UTC)Re: ...and the sheep are nervous
Date: 2003-05-05 09:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 10:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-05-05 07:03 pm (UTC)I think brick was a turn-on at the time, but they were younger then. Bed would definitely be the preferred option now. I think there's some fun coming too... but a truckload of awkwardness first. I mean -- "So, Stella jumped you after I screwed you into a wall, huh? How nice for you." Okay, I can't see Fraser saying that, but I can see a whole lot of eyebrow-rubbing in the near future!
Thank you.
Well, zowie!
Date: 2003-05-05 01:55 pm (UTC)Had no idea where you were going, but I love how you wrapped things up. Glad you figured out how to post this, or we'd all be bereft of a funny and hot story.
Re: Well, zowie!
Date: 2003-05-05 06:58 pm (UTC)Oh man, me too! Wow, that sounds all "Hey, I'm so cool." What I mean is, the rare flashes of insensitivity Fraser shows are really tantalizing to me, so the idea caught my attention. Because even Fraser must sometimes consider his needs as more important than someone else's, and when he does he can be pretty implacable. So I don't know if this is particularly in character, but I like the idea.
Thaaaank you!
no subject
Date: 2003-05-06 11:10 am (UTC)-R