Mix & Match Challenge, by sageness

[sage]

Title: Blood Sugar
Pairing: cracktastic partner-gen
Rated: PG
Word Count: 1308
Notes: Thanks to tx_tart & maelithil for the read-throughs!



"Vecchio!" Welsh called from the doorway to his office.

"Yeah?" Frannie looked up from the case file she was going over for the eighteenth time, hunting for a break that wasn't there.

"Go grab the Mountie and get down to the docks." He waved a file folder at her. "Got a body with your name on it."

"Thanks, Lieu." Frannie shuffled the papers back together with a small sigh of relief, not that she was glad someone was dead, but at least it got her out of the swamp of unsolved gang hits where no one was talking.


*


"…Consulat du Canada—"

"Thatcher!" Frannie said, cutting Meg off.

"Frannie, what can I do for you?"

"We got a case, Meg. Can you get Inspector stick-in-the-rear to set you free early?"

Thatcher's warm laugh poured through the cell phone. "I'm sure Inspector Fraser could be persuaded—"

"Hey, you don't need to make that sound so dirty."

"Frannie! I assure you nothing could be further from my mind. The Inspector is an entirely professional officer of the—"

"Fantastic," Frannie said, climbing into the Riv. "I'm on my way."


*


Frannie took the report from the uniforms and followed up with the guy who'd found the body, while Thatcher tiptoed around the Forensics guys, bright as a beacon in her requisite serge. The vic was lying crumpled in a pool of blood, a frickin samurai sword sticking out of his chest. Pretty gross, Frannie thought, especially the way the blood was congealing in the wind. Nice scrollwork on the hilt, though.

"So, Chinatown?" she asked when Thatcher reappeared.

"Japan-town, actually."

"Same street, more or less," Frannie said with a shrug.

"Yes, of course," Thatcher said, her glance traveling down Frannie's body. "Did you eat today?"

Frannie's eyes widened a little, but she told herself Thatcher was only looking out for her. They were partners after all. "Uh…I had a granola bar with my coffee this morning."

Thatcher smiled and raised an eyebrow. "That was six hours ago. Sometimes I think it's a wonder your mother even lets you out of the house."

"Hey!" Frannie protested as they returned to the car. "I am a grown woman here."

"We could get dim sum after we interview Tadeshi Matsuo's brother-in-law."

"Mmm, wait. Tadeshi-who?"

"The victim's employer."

"And you know this how?"

"Ah." Thatcher removed her Stetson and smoothed her hair into place. It was almost as dark as Frannie's, but Thatcher's always seemed to do what she told it to, and she never, ever suffered from hat-hair. It was amazing. "Well, Frannie. You remember of course that I ran track back in high school?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, my running partner was Canadian, of Japanese descent, and we spent many hours at her parents'…"

Frannie tuned out and focused on driving. Thatcher wasn't so bad, really. It wasn't anything like when Frannie'd gotten stuck listening to one of Inspector Fraser's Inuit stories for a full hour once while waiting for Thatcher to get back, and sure, the guy was cute, but not that cute. Besides, when Meg used weird words like "internecine", she didn't make you feel stupid about not knowing them, she'd just explain and not make a big deal about Frannie being a product of the Chicago school system, or whatever. And once in a while, like the books they swapped back and forth between them, some of it came in handy sometimes.


*


The interviews went quickly. Thatcher took care of translating, since she spoke Japanese, but Frannie had a knack for getting to the heart of a rivalry, and competition was competition, no matter what the culture. Just like she'd hoped, the brother-in-law got nervous and gave up a cousin. Then the cousin got scared and ran. She and Thatcher gave chase and found him hiding at his sister's, but the sister threw him out on the sidewalk, cursing him for being a liar and a cheat. He started spontaneously confessing to all kinds of freaky imports violations and stuff, so Frannie cuffed him and held him there until the uniforms showed up.

Problem was, the Mountie had gotten a twitchy look on her face, pressed her hat down hard on her hair, and bolted after the sister.

Watching the dust settle, Frannie wondered how fast Meg could swing a hundred yard dash.


*


Michiko Saito glared across the table in Interview One as Frannie paced and yelled and paced some more. Thatcher leaned against the wall saying nothing, doing that weird Mountie thing she did, waiting in the wings.

The lawyer finally showed up, right around the point when Frannie'd yelled herself hoarse and Thatcher started talking, in that low, soothing way she had, telling Michiko all about her girlhood friend Hotaru and all those years they'd run track together.

The lawyer had glared at Frannie, glared at the Mountie, and glared at the one-way mirror until ASA Kowalski came into the room to find out what was up.

"Is there a problem here, Mr. Frobisher?" Kowalski asked, eyebrow cocked.

"A problem?" the lawyer replied in a loud, bombastic voice. "No, there's no problem. I'm just wondering when this place turned into Cagney and Lacey?

"What, you got a problem with female detectives?" Frannie shot back, standing up to her full height.

"Frannie…" Thatcher said in a warning voice.

Kowalski rolled his shoulders and lifted his chin toward the woman sitting at the table. "Save it for the courtroom, Frobisher. Your client's up on murder one for stabbing a guy through the chest with a katana. Maybe we could focus on that right now, instead of the gender of the detectives conducting the investigation?"

Thatcher's lip curled into a cold smile behind him, but only Frannie saw it. It was nice. It calmed her down. And maybe she'd had a point about the blood sugar thing earlier. Her stomach was growling.

"I need some time with my client," Frobisher declared.

"Fine," Frannie said.

"Fine," Kowalski agreed.

"Understandable," Thatcher put in, and then said something fast in Japanese that made Michiko blink up at her, startled, before she recovered her cool façade.

"What was that?" Kowalski asked in the corridor, after they'd left Frobisher and the perp alone together.

Thatcher shrugged. "I merely reminded her of the dishonor a blood feud would bring to her family name and suggested that a full confession would save numerous lives, not least of which being those of her younger brother, her cousins, and potentially her sister as well."

"That's…hunh." Kowalski nodded, his carefully spiked hair bobbing.

"I also pointed out," Thatcher said with a smug look, "that Mr. Frobisher is the sort of attorney who thrives on creating media circuses and suggested such an ordeal might be considerably unpleasant for herself and everyone she cares about."

Frannie grinned. Kowalski rocked back on his expensive heels and let out a hearty laugh. "Yeah, well, we can hope, Constable. We can hope."


*


After a long wait, Michiko gave them a statement, not a confession, but enough of a statement that they were free for the day.

"So, dim sum?" Thatcher asked, and Frannie hated to let her down, but she didn't much feel like another trip to Chinatown. "Or we could go back to my place and cook? I have makings for jambalaya, butternut squash casserole, chicken kiev—"

"Um," Frannie cut in as they pushed through the double doors to the parking lot, "I think maybe you're right about me forgetting to eat, you know? Right now I think I'm hungry enough to eat a horse, and waiting for stuff to cook just—"

"How about burgers at Renfield's?"

Frannie turned her head in surprise. "God, I love how you do that."

Frannie dug her keys out of her coat pocket, watching Thatcher's amused smirk grow into a wide, radiant smile.

Comments

[cranberryink.livejournal.com]

Hee. This was super cute. Nice swaps!

[sage]

Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[buzzylittleb.livejournal.com]

Burgers at Renfields!?

You broke my brain.

[sage]

Awww... *fixes brain*

But yeah, I'd love to see an AU where Turnbull runs a little diner. *g*

[buzzylittleb.livejournal.com]

With the number of plates he's gonna break, what are the chances it will be an canadian-greek diner?

[nicci-mac.livejournal.com]

Cute - I really enjoyed this.

[sage]

Thanks, I had a blast writing it! :D

[akite.livejournal.com]

Hee! That was cracktastic, emphasis on the tastic. Fantastic in other words. A couple of more sentences there and you could have made it a slash story. ;)

[sage]

Thank you, I'm so glad you enjoyed this! And I'm glad the flirting between them worked on that level--sort of like the show itself, where RayK/Fraser is *almost* text, but in the end always remains subtext.

Still, I'm considering writing a sequel called "Sex Magic". Or maybe "Chili Peppers". I haven't written any femslash in ages, and I think I'm overdue. *g*

[norah.livejournal.com]

Yis please pretty please!

[sage]

*grins*

Let's hope the muses stick around. :D

[cold-poet.livejournal.com]

I totally loved this. The switch was just great.

[sage]

Oh, thank you! I had so much fun changing all the roles around, I'm really glad this worked for you. :D

[torakowalski.livejournal.com]

Oh wow this is brilliant. The swaps are wonderful! *g*

[sage]

Thank you so much! I'm really glad you enjoyed this!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

That is really excellent. I don't know if it's because we briefly saw an AU Thatcher at one point, but despite my not being interested in femme slash, and despite them being so very much themselves, I really liked them and wanted them to be together, be happy together. They seemed like in the show only freer, more in control, with the opportunities Ray and Ben had - and what a nice cameo by neck-cracking Ray-Ray.

[sage]

Thank you so much! I really adore the potential that Frannie and Meg have together when they're both written to their strengths instead of being written off as cartoons for Ray, Ray, and Fraser to play against. I mean, I love the boys, but it irks me when fic happens at the expense of the female characters.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

Definitely! And all good fics give them their rightful place - it just enhaces the whole verse if you do, rather than try to elevate some by putting down the others.

[tex.livejournal.com]

So funny. And a great addition to the challenge, IMHO. Yay for gen crackfic!

[sage]

Yay credible, competent women protagonists!!

*twirls you*

[mergatrude.livejournal.com]

Oh, I liked this immensely, and echo what _inbetween said about them seeming freer and more in control here where they have the opportunity to do so. Lovely.

[sage]

Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed this! I really had a blast writing this--I had NO idea I had an inner-Frannie, but apparently I do, and she's just as opinionated as you'd expect. *g*

[lorem_ipsum]

:)

[sage]

*beams*

[jenboo.livejournal.com]

okay, that was really, really, really, really, really fun! Very cracktastic!

[sage]

Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed this--and that it was as fun to read as it was to write. :D

[burntcopper.livejournal.com]

Hee! Well played, well handled, and very cute.

[sage]

Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

[lost-theplot.livejournal.com]

Aw, too cute. *hearts Frannie and Meg* I'd love to read a sequel!

[sage]

*beams* Thank you! I'm so glad this worked for you!

[china_shop]

Thatcher wasn't so bad, really. It wasn't anything like when Frannie'd gotten stuck listening to one of Inspector Fraser's Inuit stories for a full hour once while waiting for Thatcher to get back, and sure, the guy was cute, but not that cute. Besides, when Meg used weird words like "internecine", she didn't make you feel stupid about not knowing them, she'd just explain and not make a big deal about Frannie being a product of the Chicago school system, or whatever. And once in a while, like the books they swapped back and forth between them, some of it came in handy sometimes.

I love this bit, especially. It speaks volumes. This was wonderful! :)

[sage]

Thank you! I'm so glad the dynamic between them works for you!

Up With Women Protags

[merseker.livejournal.com]

Sympathetic, competent, three-dimensional women characters who happen to be my favorite women on the show. Okay, so I got a lust thing there. And Kowalski wasn't the woman who bores me poo-less, it was the fascinating Kowalski. Sympathetic, too. Nifty nifty.

Re: Up With Women Protags

[sage]

Thank you! I really like Meg & Frannie, too, when they're actually given something to do. It really bugs me to see them shoehorned into ridiculous caricatures that are never allowed to change and grow over time.

Very glad you enjoyed!

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Wow, I'm just--I'm weirdly moved by this. I mean, I like it, but I more than like it--I feel like I just glimpsed a whole other world where women are kind of the default. Frannie/Meg ROCKS. Thank you for this!

[sage]

Oh yay!! That is *exactly* the reaction I was hoping for, because the women really do have the potential to be that awesome and to participate on equal footing with the men. If only they hadn't been so grossly underwritten in canon....

Thanks for the fabulous feedback--I'm so glad you enjoyed!

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

*grin* I actually just recced you on my LJ too. It was a really great story. I adored it.

[sage]

Awww, thanks so much! And I agree, totally. This is a show I would love to see. *g*

[ceares.livejournal.com]

Frannie and Meg huh? Interesting combo, and nice role reversals with all the little background extras like Renfield's.

[sage]

Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

[brooklinegirl.livejournal.com]

dude! I *loved* this! It makes so much sense! What a great swap! Vecchio and the Mountie! Only different! And perfect! and when I saw "ASA Kowalski" I was so hoping... And it was! And I adore you! b/c this ROCKED.

[sage]

Yay! I'm so glad you enjoyed this because it felt so good to write. This AU needs to exist, dammit! And not just inside my head!! *g*

[keerawa.livejournal.com]

I came across this where you'd suggested it as a female-centric fic.

I just want to say what a plausible and entrancing little AU it is!

[sage]

Awww, thank you so much! And thanks so much for commenting -- I hadn't actually read this in ages, and it was wonderful to go back and look at it with fresh eyes. :D