Dreams Challenge by Luciferofthecircle: Cravings

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

Title: Cravings
Author: Luciferofthecircle
Rating: There’s some dark imagery. PG-13 to be safe?
Word Count: 259
Notes: I haven’t written much before, so I’m taking this challenge as an opportunity to experiment with regards to style. I’ve been reading a lot of Neil Gaiman lately so this was inspired/influenced by him.
Summary: No creature can exist without dreaming


They lie together, dark hair mingling, pale skin next to pale skin. Her mind reaching for his tangling, twisting, ensnaring him. Some kind of succubi, dark and scheming. Feeding on his thoughts, desires, fears and dreams. Seeing past, seeing future, all that he is, was and will ever be. Taking dreams both long forgotten and before they are even formed. Knowing before he does what will come to pass. Knowing better than him how he came to be this way.

No creature can exist without dreaming, dreams bring sanity, perspective. Those deprived of dreaming take the dreams of others; twist them to their own needs. This is not sustainable, this is not life but a mere extension of existence, depressing and colourless, filled with darkness until crushing despair calls for a final cessation. And the dreamers who sustain them are also called into the pit if, at the time of ending, they cannot break free.

She feeds.

Glimpses, flashes, a taste of snow, a wan child crying for his mother. She never comes. A child’s drawing. A man on horseback. The woods, late at night. Images flickering, too fast to see, to comprehend. Impressions, fleeting. A boomerang?

A snowstorm. The northern lights above. Love. Pain. Conflict. Darkness. Whose? What cause?

A light, a golden Ray of sunshine. A future, without her. Love. Healing. Resolution. Light. Joy. A happy ending. Eventually.

So now she knows. She cannot change or avoid what is to come. She does not wish to. What will be must be.

She rises and begins to clean.

***

So what do you think? If you don’t get it, please say. Unbetaed as I do not have one. (I’d like one though – hint, hint)

Comments

[mickeymvt.livejournal.com]

Very interesting.... Is the 'she' in this Victoria?? If, not it sure reads like it.

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

Yes it's Victoria. I'm glad I could get that across with what I've written. Thanks for commenting.

Cravings fanfic

[(Anonymous)]

Nicely done! A lot of Fraser's behavior in "Victoria's Secret" makes more sense when viewed through this lense - and I am SO glad that Ray becomes the reason for Fraser's happy ending.

(And that Victoria's life is not 'sustainable', too!)

Re: Cravings fanfic

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked it. Thanks!

[eledhwenlin]

Oi, this was good. :)

Victoria leaving Fraser alone, so he can get his happy ending with Ray. Greatness. :D

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

I'm so pleased you like it. Although Victoria doesn't leave because it will give Fraser a happy ending, Fraser gets a happy ending because she leaves. Vicky just sees this ahead of time and knows there's nothing she can do about it.

[sam80853.livejournal.com]

A light, a golden Ray of sunshine. A future, without her. Love. Healing. Resolution. Light. Joy. A happy ending. Eventually.

That's really powerful. Just great!

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reviewing, I'm glad you enjoyed this.

[ultra-chrome.livejournal.com]

Oh my. This is just....disjointed and dark and delicious. I love it.
This is just exactly how I saw Victoria...she drained the Fraser out of him.
Bravo, so well written.

And if you want a beta for your future stuff, I'd be more than pleased to help.

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

I'm glad I could get across a believable Victoria. Thanks for reviewing.
How familiar are you with the Due South fandom? Have you written/read/watched much of it? Because it's characterization rather than spelling/grammar that I'd like advice on. If you think you could help please e-mail me.

[nos4a2no9.livejournal.com]

Thanks for pointing this out to me - self-pimpage is the *best* pimpage!

This was a really interesting take on Victoria. In "Victoria's Secret" she seemed almost like a supernatural creature, and I like the way you've picked up on that idea here and built on it to the point where she comes off as a creature out of the Inuit tales of Fraser's childhood. I particularly like the way you excised her from time and space so that she floats above everything and offers commentary on the inevitable Fraser/RayK happy ending. The use of mythology and dreams here worked very well, and I can't really offer any criticism other than to say that there's a sense of a third figure here - the beginning seems to hint that Victoria is also watching herself as much as she's watching Fraser, and I wonder what the implications of that are.

Anyway, I'd love to beta for you (I'm familiar with the show/dialog/characters and I rock the spelling/grammar) so if you're interested email me at alexis.muirhead at gmail dot com

[lucifercircle.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much. I'm glad you like it. I wanted to write something weird, twisted and dark and the Victoria situation just fit perfectly and the story seemed to write itself. I seem to end up writing moments of introspection rather than plotted stories.
I didn't base Victoria off any one actual mythological creature so it's nice to know she feels real/plausible.
The third person thing - I appear to have unintentionally switched POV slightly through the story. Oh well, it seems to fit the story.
The lovely ultra_chrome has already volunteered to be my beta but if she is ever unavailable or if I write something long enough to require a third opinion I'll be sure to e-mail you. It's very generous of you to offer.