All Turnbull's fault
May. 21st, 2003 08:26 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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ds_flashfictionInspired by a passage in Pas de Deux by Sihaya Black
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That Incident
Constable Turnbull stood to attention, clasping the squawking duck to his chest. Downy white feathers eddied around his boots. He remained perfectly still and mentally recited the method of preparing Peking Duck, which was unfair to the duck however, as it was not at fault. Oh no, this was most definitely Turnbull’s fault. Constable Fraser crouched before the Inspector’s new drapes. Having scraped off the duck ordure and ratatouille he was now applying a concoction the colour and consistency of mayonnaise to the stains. As the duck fidgeted he tightened his grip, wondering if the unguent would also clean serge.
[Unknown site tag]
That Incident
Constable Turnbull stood to attention, clasping the squawking duck to his chest. Downy white feathers eddied around his boots. He remained perfectly still and mentally recited the method of preparing Peking Duck, which was unfair to the duck however, as it was not at fault. Oh no, this was most definitely Turnbull’s fault. Constable Fraser crouched before the Inspector’s new drapes. Having scraped off the duck ordure and ratatouille he was now applying a concoction the colour and consistency of mayonnaise to the stains. As the duck fidgeted he tightened his grip, wondering if the unguent would also clean serge.
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Whoops!
Date: 2003-05-20 03:37 pm (UTC)m
no subject
Date: 2003-05-20 03:55 pm (UTC)Brava!
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Date: 2003-05-20 05:27 pm (UTC)In Ottawa, there's a place where you can see a giant cutout of a loon dressed like a Mountie.
Until tonight, that was the funniest RCMP-related imagery I'd ever seen.
But nothing, nothing, nothing I tell you, will ever beat the image of a stoic Mountie standing at attention holding a duck.
It's something out of a Gary Larsen 'Far Side' cartoon!