First Line Challenge by Bluebrocade

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Title: Five First-Line Ficlets
Author: bluebrocade
Pairings: 4 F/K, 1 V/K
Length: ~200 words each
First Lines: Taken from five of elementalv’s wonderful fics.

- - - one - - -


"Hush!"

"Oh, dear," said Fraser, as he watched Ray’s face turn red with rage.

"Did you just—Fraser, did your dad just hush me?"

"Ah. Well." Fraser rubbed his eyebrow.

"Fraser!" said Ray.

"Benton," said his father.

Fraser looked at his father, then at Ray, then at Dief who was standing in the doorway snickering, then back at his father. "Dad. Ray. Perhaps—ah—perhaps this isn’t the appropriate—ah—venue for this discussion?"

"Yeah!" Ray said triumphantly, "Get your dead ass outta my apartment!"

"Ah, that’s not exactly what—"

"Typical Yank. Twisting the words of others to suit your dastardly purposes. Why, I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d tricked my son into—"

"You—you—you shut the hell up before I kick you in your dead head!" yelled Ray.

Fraser, Sr. narrowed his eyes and raised his fists. "Go ahead and try it, sonny."

Ray jumped out of bed and lunged at him. Fraser watched as Ray sailed through Fraser, Sr., bounced off the wall and landed on his bare ass.

Fraser leaned back against the headboard and closed his eyes, as his father’s laughter filled the bedroom. "Oh, dear."


- - - two - - -


Ray looked at the boxes stacked in their tiny living room and then at Ben, who stood there, waiting for the fight to begin.

Ray just shook his head. Crazy Mountie.

"Ray?"

"Ben."

Ben stepped towards him, then stopped. "You still think I’m being ridiculous."

"Yep."

"But Ray, if we’re ever going to afford a home—"

"Uh-uh-uh." He waved his hand in the air. "I do not want to hear it again. We’ve had this fight fifty times already. You’re still batshit insane, and there’s nothing another fight’s gonna do to change that, so you go ahead and do what you think you gotta do."

"Thank you, Ray." Ben smiled. "Your support means a lot to me."

"Don’t even! I’m not supporting you in this. I’m tolerating. See?" he gestured at himself. "This is me tolerating."

Ben frowned. "I don’t understand your objections. Supplementing our income with—"

Ray lost it. "I don’t care how small this place is, we don’t need a house bad enough for you to be selling fucking Avon door-to-door!"


- - - three - - -


They were halfway to the car before he asked, "Did anything strike you as odd back there?"

Fraser rubbed his eyebrow, cracked his neck and squeaked, "Odd, Leftenant?"

Harding stopped and threw Fraser the look.

Fraser cracked his neck again, licked his lip, then rubbed his eyebrow. Twice.

Harding crossed his arms and waited, his face impassive.

"That shade of green could certainly be considered odd. In fact, I once encountered a pick-pocket in Pelly Crossing who had the unique ability—"

Welsh narrowed his eyes.

Fraser wilted under the stern gaze of authority. "Ah—you’re perhaps referring to Detectives Kowalski and Vecchio wearing each other’s shirts? I believe...ah, that is—I don’t believe they were—ah....expecting company at that particular juncture."


- - - four - - -


"Rupert?" Though the connection wasn’t very good, Giles recognized the voice on the other end of the phone easily enough.

"Benton! To what do I owe the pleasure?" It had been nearly a year since Constable Fraser and his partner Detective Vecchio had visited Sunnydale. "I do hope you’re not calling in a professional capacity."

"Yes. Yes. I’m—I’m afraid so," replied Benton. Giles noted the anguish in his voice. "My partner—he’s—they—you have to help him."

"Tell me."

"He was—attacked. They...they turned him."

"I’m so sorry, Benton." Giles closed his eyes. He knew what was coming. Knew it was futile.

"I don’t know what to do. I have him chained in the Consulate basement, but I can’t—"

"Benton, I’m sorry. There’s nothing you can do. You can’t cure a vampire. You have to kill him. The sooner the better. It will only get more difficult with time."

There were several seconds of silence before Benton choked out a horrified "No!"

"I’m sorry to be blunt about it, but there’s no choice. If you’d rather, I can send Buffy to take care of him for you, but time is of the essence."

"No. No. There has to be a way. I won’t—I can’t—" The line went dead.

Giles was certain they hadn’t been disconnected; Benton had hung up on him. He shook his head. His heart heavy, he dialed Buffy. "Pack quickly. We have business in Chicago that we must attend immediately."


- - - five - - -


The attack took him—took all of them, really—by surprise.

Fraser took a deep breath. Tried to calm himself. It was...too much to take in. Too...inconceivable.

It was supposed to be a celebration. A party. He and Ray had come down south for the first time in two years just to be here. There’d been so much to be happy about, so many wonderful events happening so close together.

Francesca had her fifth child just three months ago. Elaine had finally made Detective. Welsh was retiring. Even Ray—Ray Vecchio—was there, smiling and showing off his own latest child, a beautiful little boy with golden blond hair.

Altogether, there were twelve children at the party, including his and Ray’s adopted boys.

Only the three youngest of them had been spared. Too young to...participate.

Fraser sat, still numb with shock, his face turned away slightly, so he wouldn’t have to see the carnage.

It was unthinkable. How could they have conspired to do such a thing?

Ray lay a comforting hand on him, bringing him out of his thoughts. "It’s going be okay, Fraser. I promise."

"Did you find out who the ringleader was?"

Ray snorted. "Who do you think?"

Fraser shook his head. "I don’t understand how he could do this."

Ray rolled his eyes. "He’s a wolf who likes cake, Fraser. It’s not rocket science. He got the kids to distract us, then went for it." He thumped Fraser on the back. "Now, c’mon, time to stop moping. We got nine kids covered in frosting to clean up."


- - - end - - -

Comments

[loz]

YOU ARE SO EVIL.

After the Vampire one I was staring, mouth open, just terrified.

These were excellent.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

*cackles evilly*

Thanks! :D

[elementalv.livejournal.com]

These are excellent! I can't decide whether I like Two or Four best, but they're all a terrific zig from the first lines in question. And the punch lines were a thing of beauty, each one of them. These are a totally wonderful way to start my Monday.

[squees happily]

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Oh, yay! Glad you enjoyed! BTW, I loved reading (and rereading) your fics. My favorite was 'Fathers' (I have a HUGE "outing" kink) and 'Lost' was wonderful and breaky (my grandfather had alzheimer's. It's such a horrible disease.).

[bertybertle.livejournal.com]

*applause* Heee! Lovely - especially number 2! Got me but good! :-)

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

GOTCHA! :D Thanks.

[delurker.livejournal.com]

Fraser wilted under the stern gaze of authority. "Ah—you’re perhaps referring to Detectives Kowalski and Vecchio wearing each other’s shirts? I believe...ah, that is—I don’t believe they were—ah....expecting company at that particular juncture."
Ahahahaha! These are all brilliant.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :D

[llassah.livejournal.com]

*g* ohhh heeheeheehee, you're evil
1- hahaha, jumping at bob! I have the clearest, crackiest image in my head with this one
2- just-just. Him, with avon! He'd be able to sell anything! billy bob fraser style *g*
3- heeheeheehee
4- eeeeeeeep! nooooo! ensoulment spell pleeeeeease!
5- oh my. hahahaha

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

YAY! Glad you enjoyed them! Thanks. :D

[leslieo54.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, the Avon one killed me ded. These are all so awesome, and great riffs on the (also great) originals... Thanks!

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Hee! Glad you liked the Avon one. I wasn't sure if it was a bit too silly. :D Thanks.

[ruthless1.livejournal.com]

Veeery sneaky miss! Very very sneaky. You had me so worried by the last one. Good one!

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[keerawa.livejournal.com]

Dear Lord. Fraser would make a FORTUNE selling Avon. Tiny little bottles, with an invitation to come back and sell some more next week.

Vampire!Ray? Ick. I jsut don't see Fraser giving in there.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the fb!

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

Hee! Very funny and cute--except #4, which is Ouch! Actually, my mind is insisting on coming up with possible solutions, such as: Fraser escapes to Toronto with Ray and enlists Dr. Natalie Lambert's (of Forever Knight) help in curing him. Or Fraser, despairing of any other solution, gets Ray to turn him and they both escape to terrorize Chicago. Or Fraser hides Ray and talks Giles and Buffy into helping him find a cure for vampirism.

(I know it's probably obvious I don't understand the Buffyverse--I've never seen Buffy.)

Anyway. I enjoyed them all. And Fraser would be the world's best Avon salesman, are you kidding? Imagine that ringing your doorbell, eh? :)

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Heh. GMTA! I was also thinking he'd have Ray turn him. And they'd live happily soullessly ever after together.

Glad you enjoyed them! Thanks for the fb. :)

[tealc-spoo.livejournal.com]

wow, somehow you told spades of story for each of them into such tiny little glimpses!

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :)

[leafy22.livejournal.com]

This made me laugh *so* much!
Ray jumped out of bed and lunged at him. Fraser watched as Ray sailed through Fraser, Sr., bounced off the wall and landed on his bare ass.

Fraser leaned back against the headboard and closed his eyes, as his father’s laughter filled the bedroom. "Oh, dear."

And I got home tonight to find...

an Avon catalogue!

...through my letterbox - imagine my excitement!!

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

YAY! I'm glad you enjoyed it! :D Thanks!

Avon catalogue -- Hee!

[buzzylittleb.livejournal.com]

These are just darn awesome.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :D

[mickeymvt.livejournal.com]

The first three were so funny, especially number two, where I can see Fraser doing the 'Avon calling.' thing.

Number four was a stunner. And I want to know what happened next. *nudge nudge*

Then you ended on a happy note with five.

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the fb!

I've decided that (for #4), Fraser -- out of desperation and a misguided belief that it'll be different, that he'll be able to control his vampireness -- has Ray turn him. Then they terrorize Chicago, draining or turning all of the major and minor dS characters, then they go North (even as a Vampire, Fraser still misses Canada) and kill some of the RCMP bureaucrats who made Fraser stay in Chicago. *nodsnods* Fraser would make a kickass vampire. Can you imagine all that knowledge and intelligence turned to evil purposes?

[mickeymvt.livejournal.com]

Oh man. I would LOVE to read that.

Fraser would make a great vamp, though I wonder if he'd eventually be a good vamp, like Angel was( the whole soul thing notwithstanding),

[viciouscats.livejournal.com]

Yay! All these are wonderful, the dead!Bob one is probably my favourite. :)

[bluebrocade.livejournal.com]

Thanks! That's my favorite one too. :D

[azamiko.livejournal.com]

*smile* Like the last one best. ^^