cherry red

[shrift.livejournal.com]

So I'm, uh, way out of practice with the whole "writing due South" thing, although every time I write Kowalski, I end up researching cars and drinking beer. (Little shaky, but muy predictable. Heh.)

This is slash. Probably PG-ish. 800 words.



"Ray!"

Ray stopped outside the school's double doors and squinted into the sun. He couldn't see for shit without his glasses even without the purple spots, but he recognized the voice, and when he brought his hand up to shade his eyes, he could make out the car sitting in the parking lot with its hood up.

"What the hell are you still doing here?" Ray said, pulling his sunglasses from the neck of his t-shirt.

Jimmy crossed his arms and leaned against the driver's side door. "Car won't start, dickhead. What's it look like?"

Ray snorted. "Again? Jesus Christ." He walked up and leaned into the engine, one hand on the hot metal body above the headlight. Jimmy had cherry red '69 Ford Mustang Mach 1. First time Ray had seen it, he'd told Jimmy that he wanted to have sex with the car. "None of your jock buddies around to help you with this shit?"

Jimmy laughed and circled the car to stand next to Ray. His gray sweats were dark in patches, and he smelled like cut grass and the weight room. "Nah, I was the last one out of the locker room," Jimmy said. He ran his fingers through his hair, and it stood up in wet tufts of black. "What are you still doing here?"

Ray shrugged. "Detention."

Jimmy's wide grin showed his chipped front tooth. "Yeah, I heard about that. I can't fucking believe you said that to a teacher, man. You're insane."

Ray smiled down at the engine and tried not to laugh. "Nah, it was dumb." Really fucking dumb, actually, since Ray was barely passing English as it was.

Jimmy stepped closer. "Know what else I heard?"

Ray shifted a little, his knees pressing into the warm bumper. "What?"

Jimmy reached out and curled two fingers into the waistband of Ray's jeans, sliding past his boxers to brush his knuckles against Ray's hipbone. "Heard you and Stella were on the outs."

It was like a one-two punch in the gut, 'hey, might get lucky tonight' coming up from his dick, and 'fucking thanks for reminding me, asshole' coming down from his heart. "Yeah," Ray said after he cleared his throat. "She wants me to fill out some college applications or she won't take me back." He looked up and saw Jimmy scowling, his fingers tugging on Ray's jeans.

"I can't fucking believe that --"

Ray cut him off. "Don't. Just... don't."

"Sorry, man." Jimmy rubbed his fingers against Ray's hip, and despite everything, Ray just wanted to lean into him.

"'S'okay." Ray rolled his shoulders and cracked his neck. He loved Stella. She was his girl, and nobody said anything bad about his girl, even if he wanted to yell at her until he was blue in the face that there were no god damn college funds for queer Polack punks with 62% averages. Ray looked around the deserted parking lot, nodded at the car, and said, "So, what's she doing?"

Jimmy ducked his head, and mumbled, "Nothing."

"What the fuck?" Ray said, taking a step back from the car. Jimmy's hand dropped away from his waist.

Jimmy shrugged and smiled sheepishly, and there were the dimples that Ray'd had a really hard time refusing for the last few years. "Couldn't think of another reason to stick around so I could give you a ride."

Ray wrapped his hand around Jimmy's nape and shook him so he wouldn't kiss the idiot right there in front of god and the principal. "Freak. What am I gonna do with you?"

Jimmy leaned back against his car, hips cocked, all big and sly. "Depends. What time you gotta be home?"

"Doesn't matter," Ray said, and it didn't, because his Pop was gonna bust his chops no matter what, so he figured he might as well enjoy his freedom while he still had it. It'd be nice not to worry about anything for a few hours. And Jimmy? Jimmy was always good for that.

Jimmy stared at him for a minute, his dark eyes narrowed a little, promising all kinds of stuff that was probably still illegal in Chicago. Jimmy jerked his head at the car. "Get in," he said, and shut the hood.

"Can I drive?"

Jimmy snorted as he opened the driver's side door. "You are unhinged, you know that, right?"

"Worth a try," Ray said, sliding into the passenger seat.

"Hey," Jimmy said, and grabbed Ray's T-shirt, hauling him halfway over the gearbox. Jimmy's mouth tasted a little like Gatorade and plastic from his mouth guard. His tongue was cool, lips a little salty, and Ray made a happy sound as Jimmy's thumb stroked over the stubble on Ray's jaw.

"Hey," Ray said, relaxing into his seat as Jimmy started the car.

Comments

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Looks like it works.

Heh, thanks. Drinking beer and listening to the Pixies! Method writing! (That's my cover story, anyway.)

But yeah, I figured sex and cars would the essence of teenage boy. I'm glad you liked it! It's been a while since I've written dS, as I said, and I was feeling mighty rusty.

had a problem with authority even then, didn't he?

Oh, I'd think so. I see a little bit of a Steve McQueen swagger to him at that age, a mouthy hormone bomb with a freshly inked tattoo...

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Shrift!!! You came out to play! We missed you! And dude, great snippet--I'm with you in seeing TeenRay as BiRay, because I can't imagine the sexual energy he must've had. And I loved Jimmy too, for going for it; he's a seductive guy, and I can see why Ray wants him. Wildly sexy!

[shrift.livejournal.com]

You came out to play! We missed you!

Hee. Well, see, I kept *intending* to come out and play, but when I wasn't exhausted from work, I was off traumatizing other fandoms with monkey brains and sudden-woobie-death.

It was a thing.

I'm with you in seeing TeenRay as BiRay, because I can't imagine the sexual energy he must've had.

Hell yeah, hormone bomb! And I think it might've been *safe* for him, too, because hey, Ray had Stella. And Stella was the one, the *defining* one, no question. So if Ray sometimes messed around with guys whenever he and Stella were quitsville, it didn't mean anything as long as nobody found out about it. If that makes any sense at all. Which it might not.

And I loved Jimmy too, for going for it

And believe me, I think Ray loves Jimmy going for it, too. (And why, uh, I really like stories where Fraser just goes for it. 'Cause, mmmyeah.) Ray's used to pursuing, I figure it must be nice to have a hot guy jump him before he can say, "Kielbasa?"

But yeah, glad you liked it! Thanks! Writing and bike-riding -- haven't done it for a while, sometimes your chain slips and you knock out some teeth, that kinda thing.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

And I think it might've been *safe* for him, too, because hey, Ray had Stella. And Stella was the one, the *defining* one, no question. So if Ray sometimes messed around with guys whenever he and Stella were quitsville, it didn't mean anything as long as nobody found out about it. If that makes any sense at all.

Ooooooh. Yes. Brilliant psychological insight there! Hey, Shrift!--Turtles!! (Ces grabs brilliant psychological insight and runs away quickly, wondering if there's something she can make out of it...)

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Brilliant psychological insight there! Hey, Shrift!--Turtles!!

That's not buddies. You just waltz in and abscond with my brilliant psychological insights with neither a here --

Shyeah, right. Pandas are flying out of my ass.

Take it! Run like the caribou! Write lots and lots of zany fic! I'll just stand over here and look impressed, eh.

[ardent-muses.livejournal.com]

His gray sweats were dark in patches, and he smelled like cut grass and the weight room.

This blew me away. Great details. Ray's in character. Jimmy's a smart, lucky guy. *G* Totally believable.

Stay and play DS with us, pleeeeease? *G*

[shrift.livejournal.com]

This blew me away. Great details.

Cool! I, uh, was sitting there last night drinking beer and squinting off into the distance, trying to remember the smell from high school.

Stay and play DS with us, pleeeeease?

Hee. I haven't left! I just occasionally... uh, run off to be unfaithful to dS with other fandoms. But I'll try to make more time for dS. *g*

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Thank you kindly!

[lamardeuse.livejournal.com]

First time Ray had seen it, he'd told Jimmy that he wanted to have sex with the car.

Wow. This just pops with great lines like this one. Obviously taking a break from DS has not dulled your pen! More Jimmy and Ray! More anything, for that matter *g*.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Wow. This just pops with great lines like this one.

Thank you kindly! Whenever I write Ray, I tend to go with my id. But sometimes the id wanders a little too much...

Obviously taking a break from DS has not dulled your pen!

If my pen is not dull, it's probably because I've been using it to kill off characters in other fandoms and needed a sharp edge. Heh.

Glad you liked it!

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

Sexy. Funny. Delightful.

I think maybe my favorite line is It was like a one-two punch in the gut, 'hey, might get lucky tonight' coming up from his dick, and 'fucking thanks for reminding me, asshole' coming down from his heart.

Although the line about queer Polack punks with 62 averages is pretty wonderful too. :-)

And the ending is just...perfect.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I think maybe my favorite line is

Yeah? Thanks. Part of the fun of writing Ray -- for me, anyway -- is coming up with similes and metaphors using stuff Ray's interested in, like cars, dancing, and boxing. ("Life is like a box of spark plugs, Fraser." "No it isn't." "C'mon, work with me, here.")

And the ending is just...perfect.

Hee. I was sending this to nestra as I was writing it and grumping about how I needed to figure out how to end it, and Nestra piped up with "Smoochies!" And I said, "I'll see what I can do."

Glad you liked it!

[justacat.livejournal.com]

I like the little Fraser foreshadowings myself:
"Freak. What am I gonna do with you?", and
"You are unhinged, you know that, right?"

Great stuff here, but I'm dying for the down-and-dirty - what happens after they drive away . . . ;)

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I like the little Fraser foreshadowings

Thanks! I was trying not to be too heavy-handed there. I figure we pick up habits and speed-patterns from other people, and I wanted Jimmy to be one of 'em.

Great stuff here, but I'm dying for the down-and-dirty

Hmm. Well, I like how this drabble ends, but if Jimmy and Ray pop up again, I'll see what I can do. ;-)

[imkalena.livejournal.com]

if Jimmy and Ray pop up again, I'll see what I can do

Don't look now, but I think they're both up at this very moment!

Thanks for doing a drive-by flashfiction!:-)

[brooklinegirl.livejournal.com]

Mmm, yummy. I love all the details you slip in here...Ray sans glasses, pain-in-the-ass Ray knowing he shouldn't mouth off to the teacher, yet unable to resist, Stella being his girl, but:

Jimmy reached out and curled two fingers into the waistband of Ray's jeans, sliding past his boxers to brush his knuckles against Ray's hipbone. "Heard you and Stella were on the outs."

Sigh. Wow. Great line. Loved this one, too:
Ray wrapped his hand around Jimmy's nape and shook him so he wouldn't kiss the idiot right there in front of god and the principal.

This was just so great. I hope you stick around and play!

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Ray sans glasses, pain-in-the-ass Ray

Hee. Well, that *is* Ray, eh? Love him, love his imperfections.

This was just so great. I hope you stick around and play!

Thank you kindly! I'm glad you liked it, and I do hope to answer a few more challenges now that things have somewhat settled down for me.

[rowanfairchild.livejournal.com]

Shrift! Dude! So cool to see you here.

Loved this -- the casual, offhanded unfolding of it, rich sensory details, and you know, the *guh* factor. Let the hormones fly! *g*

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Shrift! Dude! So cool to see you here.

Hey! Dude! I'm happy I found time to be here.

(I keep feeling like I must've been on some long journey through the Northwest Areas, or something, 'cause people keep boggling that I'm alive. Then again, I just realized that I haven't posted any new dS in, like, over a year, so, wow.)

I'm glad you liked the boysexcars&sweat! Now maybe I can knuckle down and go finish some of those wips.

[ozsaur.livejournal.com]

Of course, Ray wants to drive the car. But he doesn't seem to mind being in the passenger seat either. I like Jimmy and your Ray is perfect. Glad you are writing DS again.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Of course, Ray wants to drive the car.

Hell, *I* want to drive the car. ;-)

Glad you are writing DS again.

Thanks! I'm happy that I found time to actually sit down and write, because I've missed Fraser and Ray. I'm glad that you enjoyed it!

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

I may not be a teenage boy, but I have wanted to fuck a car or two in my time, so, yeah, I get it.
Great character, that Jimmy. Hope Ray enjoys the ride.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I have wanted to fuck a car or two in my time, so, yeah, I get it.

I'm not a big car person myself, but even I get the urge when presented with a spectacular piece of machinery.

Hope Ray enjoys the ride.

Oh, I'm sure he will. Thanks!

[jenboo.livejournal.com]

ooooh....I like Jimmy! He's a bold one, his fingers inside Ray's pants while they're still in the parking lot! Besides, his car is nearly my dream car...mine's a '67 Mustang convertible, cherry red. *g*

I get the feeling that Ray and Jimmy get together pretty much whenever Ray and Stella are on the outs. So when Jimmy heard about them, he knew he had the chance to get lucky and waited around. But he was still a bit of an awkward teenage boy having to make up an excuse to stay around and wait for Ray.

Very nice...loved the sensory details, they were really lush.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I get the feeling that Ray and Jimmy get together pretty much whenever Ray and Stella are on the outs.

Could be. Also could be Jimmy's been waiting for a chance for a good, long while. *g*

Very nice...loved the sensory details, they were really lush.

Thank you kindly! I'm glad you liked it.

[akite.livejournal.com]

I loved Jimmy, and I love your Teen!Ray. It's great to see you playing here, Shrift.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I loved Jimmy, and I love your Teen!Ray.

Thank you kindly! I had a lot of fun playing with them.

It's great to see you playing here, Shrift.

I'm happy to be here! You know, *finally*. I'll try not to get *too* distracted by the shiny other fandoms from now on.

[helvirago]

Really nice. And I have a crush on Jimmy. Is he generally the asshole-jock type, with the relatively secret personality, or is he a cool guy in day-to-day life, too? Is he rich? Ray gets along with him awfully well, and Ray gets along with nobody that well! Therefore, I theorize that he must be pretty cool, and thus I've got a crush on Jimmy.

Thank you for it!

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Is he generally the asshole-jock type, with the relatively secret personality, or is he a cool guy in day-to-day life, too?

I'm thinking Jimmy would be one of those cool guys who manage -- somehow -- to be cool all the time even while surrounded by assholes. I think Ray could've used a friend like that.

Is he rich?

Oh, I'd say his dad is, yeah. Or comfortable enough. Ray, he just seems to have a thing about crossing the tracks...

Ray gets along with him awfully well, and Ray gets along with nobody that well!

Aw, Ray's still young, and needy, and I think less apt to be prickly when he knows there aren't any asshole jocks around ready to torment the weird kid. Plus, cool car! Hot guy! And sex! Bound to have mellowing action!

You're welcome for the Jimmy-crush-age. Heh. I'm just glad it didn't suck, and by suck, I do not in this one instance mean porn.

fuck, yeah!

[kormantic.livejournal.com]

I see a supplemental back-seat scene... Surely you do, to?

Re: fuck, yeah!

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Inspiration for a back-seat scene hasn't exactly struck yet, but if it does, I'll certainly post it to the archives!

[the-star-fish.livejournal.com]

I liked this a lot (no surprise), especially the choice of cars and the bits of foreshadowing. Yay! that you're writing dS again!

[shrift.livejournal.com]

Late reply, because I am a tool!

Thanks! Glad you liked it. I'm happy that I finally have a bit of spare time on my hands to be writing dS again, too.

[rliz.livejournal.com]

I REALLY LIKE THIS

And I could, I could be more articulate? But it's 4 AM plus I think there was some kink-hittage there, not a little. So I'm going to roll off towards the bunk now.

[shrift.livejournal.com]

I REALLY LIKE THIS

Hee. Thank you kindly. It wants a little polishing, but overall I'm happy with the way it turned out.